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The Ghost and The Huntress

Twas no accident
How they came to be
Two forgotten souls
Longing to be free

One from the present
Bounded by the chain of life
The other lost in his past
Binded by death's eternal strife

By cosmos, they connected
Through the stony castle wall
Answering each other's
Mournful call

Reaching through the bars
He touched her skin
Listening to all her fears
Absorbing every tear

Twas a love affair
Between the veils
Music only the two could hear
Playing on in a methodical waltz
 As they danced an invisible dance

Gentle kisses
In the form of evening's breeze
Graced her cheek
As he held her
Mesmorized within his deepend gaze

Never had he felt so alive
As the moment she crossed
Into his afterlife
Never had she felt so at peace
Laying in his transparent arms

Night turned to day
Weeks to months
Seasons came and went
And so did they

When she called
And received no answer
A day that would inevitably come
She knew her ghost
Her distant lover
Had found the strength to move on

And as she passes the castle
Where it all began
A rainbow shines constant
Reminding her, he is never far
If ever needed again
— hardcorechick28, Oct 07, 2009

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Critiques

Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

I love it...

This is one of your best! This one only needs a couple of little tweaks to make it perfect! ~ Gee
H

hardcorechick28

16 years 8 months ago

i love it 2....

I was very pleased with the way this one has come out....to think i wrote it at work when there wasnt much to do...my boss was nice enough to let me post it during hours since i had no customers....i am glad you like it....:)
D

Dalton

16 years 8 months ago

A Word From Dalton

I liked this poem immensely, the narative is strong and freeflowing. I especially liked the lines: "Twas a love affair Between the veils Music only the two could hear Playing on in a methodical waltz As they danced an invisible dance" Perfection. Keep writing. Respects Dalton.
H

hardcorechick28

16 years 8 months ago

thank you.....

For your kind words....I am glad this was such a hit. It is actually a personal piece based on my first real experience with an actual ghost. Of course I built up the love part of it, but I did have a strong connection with a particular entity that was earthbound. Glad you enjoyed it.
autumnphoenix

autumnphoenix

16 years 8 months ago

Hello

This is wonderful. Such a visually haunting piece. I liked everything about it. You have woven a beautiful tapestry with your story. Thank you. with respect, Dana
H

hardcorechick28

16 years 8 months ago

so glad

you enjoyed it....it is a little lighter then what I usually write but still has that dark side i am noted for. Please keep checking back for future writings....
H

hardcorechick28

16 years 8 months ago

thank u

based on a little bit of personal experience with a fictional twist. i did get to be good friends with a ghost in one of the cemeteries I photograph. I used to make it a habit to visit every week til my life took a crazy turn. now i go now and then and the presence is definitely different ,less friendly. I guess even ghosts have a hard time understanding.