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In the Corridors of Fantasy(Edit)

Walking through doors
to a strange land,
the corridors ahead
spread out like hands

I went to the left
and found the dark,
creeping around
some foreign part

Retracing my steps
I went back to the light,
thinking which way
to get out of this plight

I found a corridor
lined in gold,
between the pages
and beneath the folds

Black Orchids are flowering
red poppies too,
bluebells in rainbows
and pink cockatoos

Faery’s are dancing
to a dragon track,
and elves are drunk
from drinking jack

Gnomes with cigars
and long white beards,
laughing so hard
the next county can hear

Giants with bats
and balls,and mitts
a baseball game
even I cant miss

I made a bed
under the weeping tree,
and watched in awe
as fireworks set free

— Seren, Sep 30, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

More from this author

Critiques

Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Dark

Thanks for the comment much appreciated kind regards love Jayne x x
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Jayne

I want to go there too! I love these lines: Black Orchids are flowering red poppies too, bluebells in rainbows and pink cockatoos and: I made a bed under the weeping tree, and watch in awe as my imagination can see but I would change the "as" to "all" in: as my imagination can see Love, Cat
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Cat

Thanks for the read it was a quick write it came to me last night took a while to get it together but that last line is just a fill in for the time being, when I get home tonight and everyones asleep I plan to work on this one again its far from done ... sorry I hadnt been round much but will be round tonight reading and seeing what you have been doing have missed you darlin' (huggles) talk to you tonight mwah love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x I am going hommmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeee LOL:P I cant wait I get to see my babies :P
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

I love it...

It has a bed-time story quality about it. LOL. I liked the lines: Fareys are dancing to a dragon track, and elves are drunk from drinking 'jack'. A fun read! Your imagination gone wild, and you give it free rein. I would drop the word can, and add an s to see. Just a thought. Higgest bugs, ~ Gee
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Gee

This one is far from finished the idea came to me last night, and while the boys were having a few quiet ones ;) lol and thats where the elves got their jack from the boys shared lol ... but will finish this one tonight major edit lol that last line was just a fill in till I get home and can do some serious work on it ...thanks for the read and the comment always happy when you like these :P love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x
L

lyz

16 years 8 months ago

Lmfao.

What were those boys doing last night and how many were u going to have?. I am sorry to laugh. It just sounded like them in the 6th to 7th stanzas. I took the rest seriously. Very fast paced and vivid and fun. Well done on this one. Enjoyed a lot. lol. Love Lyz. XX
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Lyz

PMSL the Elves got their Jack from the boys and the rest was purely my imagination lol the cigar smoking gnomes reminded me of my par lol so theres a little bit of everything in this one ... and its far from finsihed yet ... gotta do a major edit when I get home havent had a lot of time for edits down here and I am so tired I been sick the whole time I was here lol nice for the boys they hardly seen me lol ... thanks for the read hun I appreciate it lol I actually thought you might like this one :P love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Jayne:

This is very serious writing. The poem is excellent, even though I'm quite in favor of changing a bit the previous to last stanza, for it lends itself to double meanings, as if you were ready to play baseball with the giants, which really I don't imagine you doing. Other than that, the poem is very imaginative, and really the kind children love till the very end. Perfect! Lv&Hgs, Hugo
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Hugo

Thats exactly what I would do LOL play baseball with the giants ;) lol I have my bike licence I am a bit of a daredevil lol always been a bit of a adrenaline junkie till illness knocked me down ... I always rode horses as a young girl and went round-up out back for muster lol so yeah given the chance of baseball with the giants i wouldnt pass that up for a minute .... glad you liked this one I wrote it quickly last night I am away from home at the moment seeing docters in the city so i didnt get time to do a full edit will do one when i get home ... you take care and thank you for the read I am always chuffed when you like them love and higgest bugs Jayne x x
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Jayne:

In that case, play on beautiful lady, you got it made, the youthful energy, the crave for fun, everything is on your side! Being a South American, baseball is a great question mark over my head, and you can add a pair of blank- cartoonish eyes, lost in the rules and regulations of the game. That would be me... Honestly, Hugo
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dear Hugo

At the moment I have to live it in my head lol but later when I am better I can get back to a semi normal life(I have four children no such thing as normal with kids lol) .... but till then I shall entertain you guys with my exploits lol (huggles) thanks for the message made me smile like a cheshire cat, take care hun ... love and hugz Jayne x x x
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

I see you have...

managed to straighten out the ending. As per usual, you have done it with the style that makes it totally yours. The adventures you have in your head, make us all smile like the Cheshire cat. My smile is all the bigger, now that you are home again. Get well so that you can write us real live adventures. I wish it for you. ~ Gee.
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Gee

'little curtsey' LOL thank you kind knight you made my night lol ... :) I am soooo happy to be home my friend my own bed, my kids and ahhhh just good to be home though it was great to see the boys and I cooked them a home cooked meal while i was down there lol next time I go down they will be on tour with their band so I am going to stay at the hospital accomodation ... Thanks for the welcome home its good to be here love and higgest bugs Jayne x x
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

How do...

they say it? "Cor", it's sweet! ? Not sure, but I think I heard some Aussie say it like that. Anyhoo, stay abed as long as you need, [ get up for BTHRM, course.] and to post your newest. Then pop back in and let ppl tend to you until you are better. 'Course, iffen ya got a lap-top? Then I expect you will be back to postin' 'em so fast, I'll have trouble keepin' up. LOL ,~ Gee
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

Dearest Gee

In the local tongue it would sound like ... gorrrrd its sweet mate lol ... I am in bed today going to rest until I feel a bit better ... and I am working on one that you will like for sureeeeeee mr Knight lol ... since you gave me the idea a two wks ago lmao love and higgest bugs Jayne x x x
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

I can hardly wait...

to see what you have cooked up now. You have got my curiosty trying to kill me. [Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought him back.] I am sure that you will satisfy my curiousity, and I will come back, looking for more. You always do. Love and higgest bugs,[I get the sensation of little bugs, filled with love, tickling me.] Ha ha ha, tee hee ~ Gee
Seren

Seren

16 years 8 months ago

LMAO I have one for you Gee

LMAO I have one for you Gee ... curiosity killed the cat but CPR was what brought him back :P hahaha and you will just have to wait,he he dont know if I will get it done today ,its gotta be juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right its one of those poems lol :P love and higgest tickling bugs :P Jayne x x x
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 8 months ago

I'mmmmmmmmm waiting...

not so patiently. But I love a good surprise and a great poem or story, so I will juuuuuuust have to wait. 'Ow's the weather mate? Gooord it must be sweet, ta 'ave Spring comin' on, while us on ta otha' side 'o ta worl' are goin' inta winter's realm. 'Ow's that for an Aussie accent? I'm practicing for when me and mine hit the big Lotto. Then we are going to Disney, and then Australia. LOL Higger tickling bugs, Gee