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Simply love me

Simply love me

The night was young

I was turning in bed

You lay besides me instead

Quietly you were dreaming too

This I knew

You were too dreaming

I know about whom

As my dream extended

Into your domain

I saw you in my arms remain

The whole night passed

But nothing happened

We held our hand

In extreme silence

But that was not

What I thought would be

In the morning

When I got up

All over wet

That was I wished

You could see

— loved, Sep 27, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: ROU

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Critiques

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 8 months ago

hello

This is a wistful piece. It is full of promise, but it needs more work, imho. In this line: We held our hand I think it would be more comprehensible if it read, "We held hands". And I think the ending three lines need to be worked on. Always, Cat