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DS
Diatom Shells
Aug 27, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Carbon Dust

Carbon Dust Woman sets herself on fire. The men watch her writhe And toss her fiery hair. "Even now she tempts us," they mutter. The women watch her shake red sleeves And swirl burning skirts. "We are so tired of black dresses," they sigh. Her heart wears a corset. She loosens it and lets the beats grow fat. Her breath is bound like feet. She unwraps it And it walks away on two bright stumps. Her tongue gutters, and threatens to go out. "I choose ashes- I will not Let my rot become diamonds for the young to wear," she cries, Her face a slump of tallow behind smoke.
— Diatom Shells, Aug 27, 2009

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Sinbadthesailorman

Sinbadthesailorman

16 years 9 months ago

if it is your time to live then do so

Nobody want a single chunk of coal until their fire has gone out so burn up your fullness and turn back into the ash for if you don't all your suffaruge will enturaly last and become as diamonds for the young is this what you are depicting here? Then twirl that skirt of flaming red and damn that black dress to hell for angels truley do have wings of fire, live for today but plan for the marrow Lovely little write we all hide behind a cloud of smoke once an a while but, it is so hard to breathe in there Donnie/ Sinbad
DS

Diatom Shells

16 years 9 months ago

i think..

I think whatever u get out of someone elses poem then makes you a joint heir/author just for the sheer fact that you take your own personal experience in the read I always hate it when people say, you didn't get what it means or you didn't understand it, because that's just plain rude but I think you figured this one out quite well [wink]. -diatom shells
B

bjp

16 years 9 months ago

Dear Diatom Shells,

Ok, there is something slow in the start. Then this: Her heart wears a corset. She loosens it and lets the beats grow fat. Her breath is bound like feet. She unwraps it And it walks away on two bright stumps. An unbelievable stanza. Makes me want to give it five stars for this alone. But the second stanza doesn't meet this standard, and for that ridiculous reason, I'll subtract a star (or maybe to keep me from sounding like a groupie, which I could easily be if it made any sense.) You have the diamonds falling from your tongue - too many to simply swallow! Brian
DS

Diatom Shells

16 years 9 months ago

hello you..

you are such a sweety brian I think it is a bit slow but I kinda like it like that just like a fire it starts out slow then builds momentum and rages in the night. -diatom shells
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 9 months ago

The gruesome dying of a

The gruesome dying of a flame, a flame as in lover, a flame as in desire and a flame as in a fire oh sad thoughts to even contemplate and even sadder to commit them to paper and create a poem with ? But you are saying that this IS and we see but are helpless to do anything about. We let sleeping dogs lie, but we also let suffering people die and should lend a helping hand, if we can. Have I understood? Yours Ann of Norway.
L

lyz

16 years 9 months ago

Dear Diatom Shells

This is a beauty. I choose ashes, I know there is meaning to this for many readers, but I keep thinking, after reading again, that being used in life, she will not be used after death. Pride in tact, she walks away, as her true self. Sorry if my thoughts do not relate to ur poem, but I love it, even if my interpretation may be way off. Loved it. Lyz XX