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Note to Self

the over confidence
in your poetic prowess
is highly unbecoming;
and most assuredly
  unwarranted

so kindly remove
the stick from your ass
before commenting

uncross your eyes
from the me me me
and perhaps
just maybe
you'll grasp the read
— themoonman, Aug 07, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

More from this author

Critiques

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 10 months ago

Dear Richard

May I please borrow this poem and apply it directly to my own ego? Always, Cat
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Cat...

thank you very much! Of course you can but I don't think you need to. This was a deflating of my own but I read it to my sister the other day (along with five other new poems) and this is the only one she liked... so I posted it. Richard
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 10 months ago

OUCH!

Sorry Cat! This one is definitely aimed at moi! lol! but seriously Richard - sounds like a productive little vent there! Liked you "poetic prowess' none the less! Boni
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Boni....

thanks very much, I suppose one could direct this at themselves but that wasn't my intention... Richard
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 10 months ago

I just had this image of

I just had this image of those cartoons when bugs bunny is conducting an orchestra... and one bird then two then three.... light (is it the correct word/usage?) on his wand. as he shakes it the music begins... changes... conducts... although he might be a bit offensive to the nose... ~A someone git yer goat, moonman??????? lol. "If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is wound up in mine, then let us work together." Aboriginal Activist Group, Queensland, 1970's
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Anna...

Nah, just writing really, there are many times that I'll read a poem and miss what the writer is saying altogether but think I have and comment on it... only to find out I'm just another flawed human... Richard
press

press

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Richard

Wow ? The pen is truly mightier than the sword LOV2U PRESS
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Press...

thanks man. It is indeed at times, or it can be anyway. Richard
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 10 months ago

Richard,

I love it when you rant! Like Cat, I will borrow this one to apply to myself, thanks for the reminder. By the way, do take these "..." out, they cushion the blow! Yours, ~Nina
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Nina...

thanks... I suppose we could all do with a reminder once in a while. Richard
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Johan...

lol... be careful hitting those walls. I used to do that too, till I hit a stud in the wall one day and messed my hand up pretty good, and of course replacing the sheetrock isn't much fun either. thanks Richard
Joseph J. Breunig 3rd

Joseph J. Breu…

16 years 10 months ago

RE: Poem - Note to Self

An enjoyable piece; it's amazing how many times I have strangers (claiming to be poets) telling me to read and critique their work. And yet, they can never be bothered to invest any of their time to read my writings. I'm sure that I'm not alone in this regard. --Joe PS For me, I have always preferred the use of punctuation to stregthen one's writing. As a reader, I rather not have to guess where the pauses and emphasis on words should be.
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Joe...

glad you enjoyed the piece and you should be proud that people would want your advice on their poetry, not everyone can give as well as they receive, it is one of the drawbacks to being human. Punctuation is important in writing, directing the read can be accomplished with next lines and line breaks as well... allowing the reader to grasp rather than spoon-feed reactions. Sometimes I use too much, and sometimes not enough. thanks for reading and commenting Richard
DS

Diatom Shells

16 years 10 months ago

hi

hello moonman, I enjoyed this one I hate it when people can only see a millimeter past their nose and nothing else exists around their being. Very good vent and strong word usage. There's a lengend in qabbalah {sp.?} where a man writes god's name on a piece of paper and puts it the mouth of clay man and the man comes alive. Now, if only we could take your poem, wrinkle it up, and shove it in those people's mouths. What do you think would happen then! just a crazy thought -diatom shells
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Diatom Shells

Hi, I just got through reading a very good write by you, "Naming Eve" I haven't commented yet but I will tell you now that it was very good. thanks for reading this little jab at myself Richard
Seren

Seren

16 years 10 months ago

Dear Richard

I can apply this to me when I first started submitting poetry here, I'd get upset by comments thinking them as a personal attacks, and in reality it was just lots of good people trying to help me, and with great relief the light come on and someone was home LMAO ... (you better be smiling mate LOL) ... anyway the light was on someone was home and I realized people actually wanted to see me get better ... I was guilty of the me me me LOL ... and it become we we we ... and I am forever grateful for that cause I have made some of the most wonderful friends here ... nothing could replace the support they have given me .... Anyhoot I hope you got a laugh :P I did and I am smiling big ones have a great day and oh five stars brilliant write ... much love and hugz Jayne x x x "We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves. Lynn Hall" ...
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Jayne...

I am extremely hurt by the "you got its"... lol thank you Jayne, you got it so wonderfully and stated it better than I could, you have a beautiful spirit! hugz back at ya, and a nod for Snake! thank you for being here! Richard
Sinbadthesailorman

Sinbadthesailorman

16 years 10 months ago

I to took this to heart and so was wounded

Because I felt you were talking directly to me. Because of all the post-its I use "Notes to self" I use to use a string around my finger But, kept wondering how it got there. So many of us have things stuck in are asses but sticks, more or less likely are heads I wish that damn Mule would not stop so suddenly! Lovely read. Moon Man/Richard
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Donnie...

thanks man, but I assure you it wasn't directed at you! It was a critical look at myself. Richard
Frost Smith

Frost Smith

16 years 10 months ago

themoonman...

Like hitting a school yard bully in his mouth; this has teeth and is a departure from what I was used to seeing from you, hope this passes. Frost
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Frost...

It is so good to see you! I keep wondering if you are coming back or not, are you? Your opinion means a lot to me, but I'm not really sure what you are saying here, well I did all the way up to the "hope this passes" Richard
Frost Smith

Frost Smith

16 years 10 months ago

themoonman...

Not coming back to level of involement I once had; but not staying away as much either, I had not seen much in the way of agro work from you and that is what I hope passes. Frost
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Frost...

I can't help but get a bit hostile with myself sometimes, I think it is a very human trait... thank you for your well wishes! and hope to be reading your works again. Richard
B

bjp

16 years 10 months ago

Dear Richard,

Olya often thinks about dotting her "T"s and crossing her eyes, but gets few giggles. This little serenity prayer of a poem is a giggle. And it is a universal admonition. Brian
M

Marie-I-Be

16 years 10 months ago

overconfidence

Hi, Mr. Moonman. Mind if we retitle this as Note to Selves and all sign our names? ;-))
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Marie...

as you know, once it is out there... it is no longer ours. I thought some may relate to this but am surprised at the positive responses to be honest. I am glad of it though, and happily would retire it and let all sign... a beautiful thought! thanks Richard
greeneyes

greeneyes

16 years 10 months ago

hello moonman

i really liked this poem.sometimes i think you are a little harsh on people in your comments.But i really do like your poetry.
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Green Eyes

thank you for your encouraging words. I guess sometimes I can be a bit harsh or I like to think of it as straight forward, which can be misconstrued as harsh or mean even... I rarely am trying to come off that way, may've been part of the reason for this particular write. thank you again! Have I commented on your work? I will have to look now you've got me interested. Richard
W

Wafi

16 years 10 months ago

A Good Note To Self

A good note to self, Richard. Love your honesty! I like the brevity in your poems a lot. Sincerely, Wafi "Culture, location and beliefs; All vanish with love!" ~Afzal Shauq~
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 9 months ago

Five star cusine...

I thought this was five star cusine. I will eat those words right along with everyone else. You made them palatable, thank you, Gee.
deelilah

deelilah

16 years 9 months ago

Hi Richard

There are some who may apply these words, but I don't think you are one of them. Deelilah
M

mantiscepter

16 years 9 months ago

words

I'm sorry I missed the party. Hard words; soft heart. who says honesty hurts. show me the money. ok, enough. I liked it; forward. to the point .well written. Mantiscepter
O

orgami

16 years 9 months ago

discovery

I love your honesty and approach I have such an egocentric girth I actually sat through a meeting and listened and kept my mouth shut and tonight for a change am trying to comment on a few poems (thanks for reminding me I was wondering where I put that stick!!:) )
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

16 years 8 months ago

Note to self

Richard Just love his I just chuckled to myself but i needed it as i sit here alone with no one Thank you Maggie