Dear bastard

When I ravage the streets flat nosed
a boxer's hymn to all
who know
tread gently on my fixed pose
for you might be the one
I owe

Friends come in various shapes
deliberate or without consent
I've learned so much from your mind
all bent
to value a wisdom brought forth with
contempt

So push further, dear bastard!
my Buddha,- you´ll last
hate and loathe
be the tyrant's master
your ignorance is my entrance
to epiphanic grace and resilience

— doorman, Aug 06, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: NOR

Critiques

Kenneth Sharp

16 years 10 months ago

Hmmm…seems fiery and

Hmmm...seems fiery and abstract, perhaps spurred by the 'gut' feeling of being wronged by a supposed friend, and having an acidic catharsis. I like it in a sort of nihilistic sense. The last two lines are particularly poignant to me.

doorman

16 years 10 months ago

Thanks for reading

Yes. This one dropped out(not on acid, though) of me pretty suddenly. Wondered whether to post it or not, but self-censorship is not a good teacher. So, thank you very much for reading and commenting. It is much appreciated. e.

Bonitaj

16 years 10 months ago

I totally get it!

Hello Espen: This is indeed a gem. An interspersing of the Buddist message (everyone you meet is your teacher)"Friends come in various shapes deliberate or without consent I’ve learned so much by your mind..." and good descriptive metaphors eg. "tread gently on my fixed pose" Outstanding! Excellent write - hope you've taken the message to heart and you're over the irritation you felt whilst writing! lol CHeers Bonita j ps. check these grammar issues briefly. (From your mind?) (Check spelling in that last stanza - YOU'RE MY BUDDHA.)

doorman

16 years 10 months ago

Bonita

You caught the message and enjoyed the words, what more can I ask for? Thank you, Bonita. The frustration ran away with the poem. All the best, Espen

harriet

16 years 10 months ago

readible

it was quite a nice piece, i loved it , and i wouldnt mind reading your work again, keep up the good work..

doorman

16 years 10 months ago

Thank you!

Thanks for reading the poem, Harriet. I'd be honored if you'd take the time to drop by again. Espen

Ink Dragon

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Espen,

so, you were "a bit pissed off"! (Hilarious understatement, laughed when I read that.) Liked this rant that turned into a mantra. While your first two stanzas flowed very well, the final one didn't for me. May I offer a suggestion? So push further, dear bastard! my Buddha you'll last hate and loathe, be the tyrant’s master your ignorance is my entrance to epiphanic grace and resilience Yours, ~Nina

doorman

16 years 10 months ago

Ink Dragon

Nina. Good of you to stop by. Push further, dear bastard..,- you´ll last. I see your point. Everlasting is perhaps a bit of a mouthful here. Thanks for untying the knot. All the best, Espen

Ink Dragon

16 years 10 months ago

Sorry

Seems like the demon of double posts is back.

Ink Dragon

16 years 10 months ago

Espen,

I do like that better. "A bit of a mouthful" is quite correct ;) Yours, ~Nina