By You

I'll always remember

days shared together

their memories
will see me through

this life of existence

without you beside me

for they
will bring me to you

with a joyous smile

eyes closed tight

let the memories
my dreams come true

— mantiscepter, Jul 29, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

yenti

16 years 9 months ago

Mantiscepter

The theme behind this piece was very good but somehow there were bumps in there that I can't put my finger on, Just have a read again and see if you can tidy this piece it will be quite good then, Yours Ian.T

mantiscepter

16 years 9 months ago

By You

thank you for your comments yenti; Always glad to get feed back from people, and see their views.If indeed you put your finger on what you think these bumps are, give a shout Have a nice day. Mantiscepter

yenti

16 years 9 months ago

Hi Again

A few bumps found ??????:- By You I’ll always remember days shared together their memories (Their loving memories) will see me through (Have seen me through) this life of existence without you beside me for they (What they held inside) will bring me to you with a joyous smile eyes closed tight let my memories (In my memories) these dreams come true Hope this shows a smoother way, lol Ian.T

mantiscepter

16 years 1 month ago

By You

It went right by me/ thanx for the input, I will view all I write, Mantiscepter

Seren

16 years 9 months ago

Dear John

Closing my eyes I just dream lol but its beautiful again my friend you really have a way with your pen ... love it .. love and hugz Jayne x x

mantiscepter

16 years 9 months ago

By you

I am happy to see you found one of my many rewrites, and as I see it was to, your liking. Today I took a look at all the poems with no response,so I decided to clean them up. thanx Lynn [ love back to you. Mantiscepter