Free Falling

Hi Talia You have used similar expressions to myself to describe your feelings. Feelings which echo some of mine. I particularly like the line, "I’ve forgotten the way back to my self", excellent! Regards Barry

Ooops, a glitch, doubled up... see below.

Hi Talia, no doubt at all this is full of passion, you capture your own desperation really well here, I do want to be left with some (even slight) resolve though (might be just me, I find it uncomfortable when the ability to "fix" oneself must rest on another... I have no doubt you are fully aware that in the end we can only do that ourselves)... Still I think your words carry the intensity of your sense of powerlessness well (hope you're not really feeling that in truth, not that it's my biz... but I do think writing helps work through that stuff too). I suspect many of us (especially writers) have been through our own version of this, look forward to seeing you blossom on the other side of it. Take care Cheers Anni~ ` "Those who dwell among the beauties & mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life" ~ Rachel Carson Writer/conservationist

as to impose my narrative on yours, well maybe sometimes, recovering later, understanding and recognising losing grip. The illusion of conrol is so hard to relinquish. Then learning that oneself is the teacher. I comment on content because this is basicly prose. Well written prose. Cheers, Jess

Creative writing is the song of your heart and mind. It must be from both, a duet if you will. You will get a lot of feedback on your work, If you wish to go in a different direction, so be it. Only you know where you want to go, and if you ask for help to get there you will recieve it. You have some good work here, and I think you will go far. Geezer.

I saw from your profile you have aspirations of song writing...so with that in mind I played with this poem to see if there is a song that can be created from it: Guide me to the light Save me from myself This hollow feeling is starting to break Breaking my soul Breaking my heart I’ve forgotten the way back to myself (bridge) Teach me to feel, teach me to love Whatever it takes, open my eyes (chorus) Searching, seeking, losing my grip My fingers loosen, and away it slips Falling, breaking, losing my mind. Constantly needing someone to guide Going under ever so slowly My screams are muffled Numbness consumes me in one gulp Let me see the beauty That forever surrounds For colour is fading to a pallet of grey (bridge) Teach me to feel, each me to love Whatever it takes, open my eyes (chorus) Searching, seeking, losing my grip My fingers loosen, and away it slips Falling, breaking, losing my mind. Constantly needing someone to guide I’m asking you nicely I’m begging you, please Bring me to life, don’t ever leave... ...and I asked you so nicely. --------------------------- I had to make some minor changes, but in short, you have a song in this poem. Apologies for hijacking your poem...I couldn't help myself. regards, HS ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "With all that I am and all that I could be, I walk this earth and yet nobody sees me".