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Still Here

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With my hands

I have made all of these things

My family and my friends

My happiness and my joy

In these hands I have held all of my loves

And all of my losses

 

The memory of the smile in my eyes

Will hasten away the ghosts of your pain

 

Some might think I am gone

But with these hands

I have built the memories that last

 

I will find you in your thoughts

And we will laugh again

And know that even tomorrow

There will be a sky full of sun







— Michael Anthony, Jul 27, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: San Francisco Bay Area - USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Bukowski, Billy Collins, Ted Kooser, Haiku & Harvey Kurtzman (a visual poet, of sorts)

More from this author

Critiques

Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 10 months ago

We're on the same page...

In terms of our subject matter. Liked the idea of holding the world together "in your hands" - not sure if I like the concept of 'making' family/friends.... too concrete - too God like? Perhaps retain the idea but change the verb there to something else eg. 'In these hands I have HELD all of my loves & loses' is credible and indeed powerful Just a thought though - it's your call after all! lol Second stanza. Shouldn't that read THE MEMORY OF THE SMILE IN YOUR EYES - WILL HASTEN AWAY THE GHOSTS OF MY PAIN... that's how I read it. keep doing what you do best! - getting out there with your stuff! Cheers Boni ps STILL HERE - nice title!
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 10 months ago

Hello

I have to agree with Boni's comments and suggestions, here. A good write for the most part. Always, Cat
Michael Anthony

Michael Anthony

16 years 10 months ago

Thanks for the feedback

I was writing this from the viewpoint of the person who had left the proverbial mortal coil, and I was trying to imagine a final conversation they were having with me (3rd person?). In other words, I wanted them to say something that would make me feel better about their passing. Does this even make sense? I really appreciate the feedback, but would you still recommend the re-write given this explanation? We are all trying to get better, so help me here??? Best to you both, Mike