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One Two

==

One
Two

:

artless

prose can
turn         itself
             to verse
when words
can          place them-
             selves on
an else
blank        white page
             just so

:

(1)

an
ugly

snapping turtle
on stream's side
boulder
            flat
                     upright

slips slanted into water
slanted
into              a silent
water           stone

now she isn't
she's            there
gone

--

(2)

as
to

cats?

cats are sometimes, well,
are
at              
times                            catty;

I say at times are,
they
are,

and too women,
too
men;


not all of them;
just some of them,              
                                    mind
                                    you.
mind you,
mind you.


fish, on another hand
(or other fin or paw),

are always, they are,
they
are
always,    

no two or three
two
or                              ways
three                        about it

(and by always, I do
mean all the time),

fishy,

as are                     lawyers,
are

lawyers
politicians
preachers

Internet hackers
identity thieves
IRS agents ...

and sometimes even
sometimes
even
used
car                            slick
salesmen

and
-women

==
 

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Country/Region: USA

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Comments

Cloudthings

Cloudthings

16 years 9 months ago

you play with form & sensibility it is a joy & pleasure always

I chuckled & chuckled (sorry bout the pun, realized as I wrote it CHUCKling even more), until I got to the end & went Ohhh!?!? Not all women, as not all men I suppose. Dear Chuck I adore how you play with form & sensibility it is a joy & pleasure always... How could I suggest a single change here... no way. Cheers Anni~ ` "Those who dwell among the beauties & mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life" ~ Rachel Carson Writer/conservationist
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

If I may here ...

further interject to clarify (a clarification that in truth may not be necessary): The piece's last-line "-women" you reference is deliberately hyphened at its front, which of course permits me to avoid repetition of "sales," as in "salesmen." In fewer words, the "-women" merely abbreviates (used-car) "saleswomen." Thanx, Chuck
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Thanx so much

This (if I can call it) style is something that just in about the last month I've played with ... to my amusement/enjoyment (actually). As well it meets my need for trial, for experimentation, for trying on something new. This is my first post of such. Was wondering how it'd look/feel to others. And now I know as to at least one: Anni. Yours, Chuck
M

Marie-I-Be

16 years 9 months ago

wonderful maze

Here you go again, Chuck, proving my comment that you are a uniquely creative person! I love the feeling of traveling through your maze of words, first reading down, then reading across, then adding in a single word so cleverly popped in off to the side and supported only by its own weight. Gotta watch out for those fishy lawyers, politicians, preachers, and those slick used-car salesmen and saleswomen! Yeah! Please, please, post some more jewels like these! I want to experience more of this adventure.
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Thanx

Actually, I was prepared to post another this morning. But ... but I'm feeling a bit let down from a few of the current behaviors and manipulations running about this site presently. Perhaps I'll reconsider (as to a new post) on another day. Again thanx, Chuck PS: I'm delighted you caught sight of multiple paths/pathways embedded within this piece. Gratifying.
deelilah

deelilah

16 years 9 months ago

Hello Chuck

This was so fun to read and see the tricky little nuances you played with the words and the placement. You have inspired me always, but this time I think I'll go play this little word game myself, for my own amusement. How fun! I love your new picture. Is that Lake Michigan? If so where? and if not, where? Always, Deelilah
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Wonderful!

I like having a playmate when juggling word games. Hope you get one together enough to post. I've got more in the pipeline ... and it's terribly fun, the writing, that is. Like putting puzzle pieces together. And when they don't precisely fit, I can just scissor them around the corners to make them right. The pic's on a beach in Puerto Rico. And last but not least ... your new pic's terrific. My favorite. Happy writing, happy hauling. Yours, Chuck