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The Cedar Tree

Growing up where I did hope was tangible. There was the pain, sadness of events, the dreariness of the fog, damp cold a constant. My Dad would say with a laugh, "don't like the weather just wait the wind will switch it." Sure enough, the wind would kick up the fog would be gone. Followed by sunny blue skies. Smiles all around. One day my Dad took me to see a special tree. We took a long hike up a rocky slope to find this tree, to make a pilgrimage. I think what struck hope into me was defined by a cedar tree, gnarled, twisted, majestic, alone, growing out of a rock on a cliff above the great lake. Growing, thriving in unforgiving circumstances taking everything that nature could throw at it. Yet still it lived. Beautiful in its tenacity to survive. I shared my Dad's fascination with that tree. I thought to myself if a seed can find what it needs out of a rock, I guess I can too.
— raskin, Jul 23, 2009

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themoonman

themoonman

16 years 10 months ago

Hi Raskin

Welcome to the site. I see by your profile that this isn't your first post, but it is the first one I've read. I thought it was very good. There seemed to be a few spots that needed commas for the reader to not lose track, maybe a couple of line separations would also help... but other than that, very good... with that grand message floating there at the end...yes, I liked this poem. Richard
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wizzardofodd

16 years 10 months ago

Pretty darn good

Hi. I really like the picture your poem paints. The rhyme scheme is good. I do agree with Richard that the punctuation needs juiced up.
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raskin

16 years 10 months ago

Thank you two for the comments

I had taken out punctuation from what I had written. I'm interested to know where you would place the punctuation. raskin
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wizzardofodd

16 years 10 months ago

I’d use quotes or line

I'd use quotes or line spacing for your Father's comments. Also, I'd break up the lines more to flow with the ideas.
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raskin

16 years 10 months ago

good suggestion

I'll try it. Thanks I hadn't thought of it but it makes sense. raskin
B

blistered-pen

16 years 10 months ago

excellent last thought

the end was awesome. very.. hallmark-y hope. everybody loves hope. :) oh, I also agree with the punctuation & separation.. it wasn't too hard to tell the two narratives apart but it did take away from the story to keep wrapping my head around where each character starts & stops [i have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but i don’t always agree with them. _George W. Bush]
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raskin

16 years 10 months ago

Thanks Bonita j

I have to come back to this one and do the re write when I get a bit of time. Thankyou for the encouragement it is greatly appreciated! raskin
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 10 months ago

Raskin

This story-poem about former days with your Dad tells me a lot about the way you handle things, always with sensitivity. I like this poem and I agree with the spontaneous philosophy you derive from it. Thank you. God bless. Hugo.
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raskin

16 years 10 months ago

Thanks Hugo

for the kind comment. I have to revise this one yet but yes it was one of my points that illustrated life for me. I can always go back in difficult circumstances and think of that tree still alive, thriving. I needed to see physical things to develop my philosophy, poetry helped that because I could equate the pictures with the emotion. I do that a lot with what I write, it's my approach. Thanks again Hugo for adding me as a buddy. raskin
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 2 months ago

Oh you too love trees, they are what I turn to in distress

Ann of Norway Oh you too love trees, they are what I turn to in distress they are somehow constant and always beautiful and cedar trees are so majestic, they spread and grow so tall that one feels the right proportion to life, like the paintings of the ancient Chinese masters who depicted man in those right proportions, we are but tiny insects compared with great cedar trees. And the growing out of a rock, there are many trees in Norway like that, often as small as the Japanese Bonsai trees, but they have that elegance still, of size, in my heart. Love you too Raskin, Ann
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raskin

16 years 2 months ago

They depict grace and

They depict grace and endurance. I still remember trekking up to see that tree, it was called the witches tree then, now it is some other name. The indians called it the witches tree. It was an extraordinary sight, it was an old tree then growing out of rock. My father was fascinated by it and so was I. To think of a seed resting on a rock ledge over time waiting until the conditions were right to take root. It fascinated me and I have always held that close to my heart. Again, Ann thank you for seeing something special in this tree. raskin