Puppets and His play

We are all puppets in His hands
He may play and brake in his play
Some may be in rich case and
some may be in dirty mud
Few may dazzles as gold and
few may be abondaned in roads
He will brake everyone but
time to brake may differ
He is the player and
He is the player
What we can in his play
Just watch His play as a mud
It is our role and it is our part
We can do nothing in His play

— SAKTHEEE2007, Jul 20, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Critiques

yenti

16 years 10 months ago

Sakkthee

The theme is great with the great man pulling the strings and the puppets being of all types, Just that the Brake is the other Brake which slows things down I thinkl the word you need in English is Break to destroy or damage something:- That he may play with and break He is the player and He is the player The bit after the first He is the player seems not needed, Just a little tidy up here and there, Yours Ian.T

Geezer

16 years 10 months ago

Puppets

Try: A few may dazzle as gold, A few feel abandoned in the road. He is the player, and the director. What can we do in his play? Just watch his play...from our mud. It is our role, our part. I would leave off the last line, We can do nothing, in his play. It has already been said, and just seems repititious. Only suggestions Sakkkkkkk. Good title, good theme, and consistant. BTW Ian is right, break is the word you want. Your friend in poetry, Gee.