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manna

==

manna

::

the greatest, most
original sin was
the less committed by
the gullible Eve, or
the easily persuadable
Adam, the more by god

                                  —barbsdad
::

if I’ve got the story
approximately
straight, it seems (to me)

that an egocentric god
created god created god,
and so forth ad infinitum,

in its/his/
her own image;

until,

after
becoming
somehow

(though not at all
surprisingly)

bored with
such
a constant
cloning
repetition

of

self-entities, it/he/she
chanced on a jury-rigged design

for
the humans of this world
in
particular,

those questionably
rational animals.

and

being
at least
somewhat

mature by that time
of its/his/her own evolvement
of perspective, outlook,

and

general demeanor, 
it/he/she—god, that is—
followed through

(to its/his/her
ultimate chagrin)

with
a
view

to
recycle those
singularly peculiar
mammalian primates

on down through
subsequent eons.

but …

so then, to dock a long
tale,  that same god concluded—

and
rightly
so—

after
witnessing for a time
the what could have been
naturally foreseen

(indeed
by
a more competent
god)

outcomes

of its/his/
her works

(those
very same outcomes
that came about
apparently as the result

of
a multitude
of
unintended
consequences)

that an error of
monumental — er, godly —
dimension had begun
it all.

is
it any wonder, then, that
that same god grew surly—

even
ticked off—

and
distant,
and
frankly
tired of
the whole

lot
of
it?

and
so it/
he/she

nudged its/his/her
usual set-in-stone mindset
undeniably—

and
not without
a related
resentment—

into
a state
of

self-protective,
overarching denial
about

its/
his/
her

so
demonstrated
omniscient
capacity

for error
that started
the whole

damned
unsavory
mess

in the first
place;

and

throwing up its/his/
her hands in disgust,

it/he/she resolved
at long last to leave humans
alone to stew in

their homemade

toxic
juices.

which is probably
right where they feel most
at home.

==

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

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Comments

S

smokedoctor

16 years 9 months ago

Background

For introduction to background on the aforesaid process, see essay and references on why Charles Darwin, M.A. (Theology) wrote _Origin of Species_ at http://medicolegal.tripod.com/darwin2009.htm
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 9 months ago

Chuck...

I'm merely stewing in my own juices here as I read this very logical piece I'm reminded of how fragile our juices are... and yet here we be... with all the vigor and emptiness we can muster for the moment for the day for the juice you always get my mind to swarming... Richard
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Your ...

... "mind to swarming" brings to mind the image of killer bees, so-called. Thanx, Chuck PS: Looks like you started (I suspect you're to blame for it) a long line of comments here. Amazing.
themoonman

themoonman

16 years 9 months ago

No Sir...

I am not to blame, it was you... tickling the ivory of thoughts leaving us swaying in the wordings... swarming, like bees! Richard
B

bjp

16 years 9 months ago

Dear Charles,

This is a terrific piece, and, like Jess' most high compliment, I too would have liked to have written it. Brian
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Thanx ...

... much for the read, the comment, the stars ... and last/not least, the flattery. (Which will get you most anything.) Yours right back, Chuck PS: Hi, Olya!
Seren

Seren

16 years 9 months ago

Yet another masterpiece from

Yet another masterpiece from your Pen , Brilliant , wish I could right like you chuck I really do .. Much love Jayne x x
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Sometimes ...

(I laugh) I wish I could write like I do. Many of my posted pieces started out a pile of rocks, traveled a bumpy road, and after much whittling/pulling/pushing/sculpting, as well as freeing up the inevitable jams, reached a level I considered postable. I have a process, though I don't really understand how/why it works when it does. It's a sweet mystery. I don't trouble myself over it. Some mysteries, I think, are a lot more fun when they stay that way. That is, mysterious. Thanx, Chuck PS: I hope you don't give up on haikus (or their ilk). I noted a later comment after mine on your posted request dissed haikus in general. I soooo disagree with his antipathy aimed that direction. I've found haikus (and their forms) to be challenging, self-educating. They've made me a better writer than I would have been. And contrary to his assertion, they possess an inherent potential for complexity/variety truly astounding. And of course the discipline of them doesn't hurt either.
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 9 months ago

Chuck,

glad to see this one in spotlight! A very clever, philosophical piece, topped with your usual sense of humour. My only teensy critique on this one: The repetition of "he/she/it" gets a little tedious in my opinion. It's a little like hitting a nail with your hammer when it has already almost disappeared in the wall... Do you think you could find a way around that? Yours, ~Nina
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Since ...

there seems to be (and has been for a long time now) a strong post-Fundamentalist view that [G]od might not be limited to being a [H]e, I thought I'd have more fun emphasizing that it/he/she (or he/it/she or she/it/he or it/she/he) or perhaps some other rotation of order of the pronouns might assist in fleshing out the overall humorousness of the piece ... a write I frankly thought'd get very little attention here (except perhaps complaint concerning its overarching blasphemy (which of course is/was much intended by the writer)), being as it goes so well against the grain of actual OT (Old Testament) [S]cripture. I was steeped in Fundamentalism of the Christian sort from before birth till emancipating myself gradually over the years since onset of adulthood. I suppose among the Christians of my youth, I've become a sort of adult hood. In the flesh. And I'm well aware that flesh is sinful, is of Satan, etc., etc. For me in particular, the childhood so chained by religious dogma amounted to child abuse by those naive people near and about me. I recognize they did/do not know any better. Though even with that recognition in place, I have trouble excusing them for it. As I think I should. That is, have trouble with it. Oh, well, enough already. Thanx for reading, for commenting, for listening. And ... you're a dear. With affection, Chuck
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 9 months ago

To Chuck and Nina

I too was abused in the name of religion by a Grandmother who was a religious fanatic. She called me "Demon Spawn" and decided that she must beat the "Devil" out of me. I had to live with her from age five to seven. From the age of twelve I rebelled against all organized religion. Nothing scares me more than a fanatic, be it religious or political. Always, Cat
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 9 months ago

Scary fanatics!

I'm sorry to hear that, Cat. No child should have to suffer like this... and I guess the clever ones end up rejecting religion altogether, whereas the less clever ones turn into fanatics themselves... Yours, ~Nina
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 9 months ago

Hi Chuck, I wrote a poem

Hi Chuck, I wrote a poem called *Mystery* a couple of days ago may post it today. I was fortunate that I never had any fundamentalism drummed into my young mind, although my grandfather on my father's side was a priest and I was raised Catholic; however, my life-long passion for truth took me through many paths... Your poem is food for *enlightened* thought & conversation. It makes me crazy to see children made into minature adults worshipping the God(s) of their parents... be it Hindu, Christian, Muslim, Jewish or the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (which I kinda like). http://www.venganza.org/ Thanks, Anna "You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality." Ayn Rand
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

I ...

am not allowed access to your profile ... and don't know, really, what you're saying/suggesting here. Chuck
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 9 months ago

Chuck

I couldn't help myself, I just had to read this to my hubby, who having a mindset like you on this subject, howled with laughter. This is a very big compliment from him. I loved it too! Always, Cat
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

I'm so glad ...

the humor (spoof, satire, poking fun of it all) came through so well to you and yours. Thanx, Chuck
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 9 months ago

try he/she/it….and just

try he/she/it....and just use heshit o...nevermind! (but i do like your mind, you do quite well when left to stew, i'll meat you in Dr. Moreau's labor-a-story. ~A "Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood." T. S. Eliot
O

orgami

16 years 9 months ago

HMS BEAGLE

and years later the EAGLE landed on the moon as Darwins ship moored off a tortiose infested island some years prior I would love to stroll about in the garden of EDEN unashamed of my body and needing no bothersome fabric or textiles Proud and beautiful though they may be Serpent skin is supple they say but I prefer the winds fancy touch but we were tempted First the serpent to Eve and Eve sharing knowledge to Adam We could walk amongst the animals being master of them They had no fear of us and we of them Everyone living in eqaulity No need for AR-15's Ahbram Tanks or Leaopard II's (or A4) but we were asked to leave I am still in belief that man's choice in chosing wisdom and knowledge and recieving mortality now gives us the role of master And I think we can better create a better animal and human through genetic engineering With the help of science Perhaps we can find a planet perfect for colonization show God that we can create a replica for the sins we committed long ago Maybe we can make an ark of embryos on a special spaceship well one day maybe of course this is just fiction like a fig leaf withered and dry thoughts that will crumble into dust any day soon Your poem is grand I enjoyed the thoughts very much and we are the stew bubbling away with verve and odour MMMMmmmmmm (more sir!!)
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

So ...

sorry I was abruptly bumped from the library computer yesterday ... and did not get to reply to your comment. Which I find fascinating, actually. I like your musings, your sideways glances, your subtle insights, your intelligence, your turns of phrases, your lines ... have I said enough? Probably not, but enough already anyway. I'm sure you've no idea how much you've influenced my writing at this site. And for the better. --- a special thank you for that. --- Yours, Chuck
D

Dick Richarson

16 years 9 months ago

Is this Poetry?

Oh my, I must be old fashioned, but is this poetry? Dick Richardson.
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 9 months ago

Poetry is in the *I* of the

Poetry is in the *I* of the beholder. BTW, we have to know hell, to know heaven. This 3-dimensional reality only knows itself through the experience of opposites, eh? ~A "You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality." Ayn Rand
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 9 months ago

I am in favor

I am in favor of people having choices, I mean free will. Fanaticism was not God's intention, but the wrongful , egoic desires of some people, have made religion a matter of life or death --meaning also brute force and abuse. Just get out the forceful option of imposition through the sword, and then we will have religion in its purest form. Religion for me is not just a set of imposed rituals, but a way to attain oneness, and an unconditional acceptance of our own reality, which includes of course people. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm also in favor of the order that brings the law. Whatever man does to himself in particular, he'll do it anyway; but whatever we do to others, and is against the law, that's a different whole story. Simply because I believe in law, I'm not against authority. But because authority is not perfect, I leave the rest to God. After all, nobody knows ultimately the reason for every single injustice we undergo in life. With great respect to all. Saludos. Hugo
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 9 months ago

I read it again,

and gathered that God's whole interest is in the family (homemade juices). However, Chuck's God left man and woman "alone" --what's the meaning of that? Is it without any ruling, or consequences for their acts? The beginning and middle of the poem was concerned in setting up a stage for the end, isn't it? If I can explain myself again, all I understand is that to be raised above the law, and be constituted as the Law, you have to obey the law. Is it logical? If God had the "power" to create humans, wasn't he supposed to obey the human law? That is, as Cesar Vallejo --a peruvian poet-- said: In order for God to be a good God, he would have had to become a human himself. Not just his Son, but God the father too, or any other possible God. Respectfully, Hugo.
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Hugo

Thanx for the read ... and comment(s). Although I think you misunderstand the piece, and that quite significantly, I've no problem with that. I do appreciate your visit. Thanx, Chuck PS: Don't think it has anything to do with "family," as you suggest. It also has nothing to do with "law."
hugo la rosa

hugo la rosa

16 years 9 months ago

Barbsdad

As a poet you are excellent! The only thing I'm a little bit concerned is your philosophy of life. But then again, should I be concerned? Therefore, let me just say thank you for the way you make people think. Saludos. Hugo.
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

I think ...

... this piece speaks more to my sense of humor than it does philosophy of life. After all, this write (spoof, satire, whatever) is really not about life; it's about religion---and in particular singling out Christianity. And all its ills. Of which I find plenty extant to poke in the ribs, so to speak. (And with much delight, I might add.) And thanx re the "poet" comment, by the way. Yours, Chuck PS: I do think that given your perspective, it'd be darn near impossible for you to understand what I've here written. It's not lack of intelligence that's limiting you in that respect; it's where you're coming from. And I know whereof I speak. I've been there. And despite the grace of "god," I've managed to make my escape. (I'd say, "Thank God," but why would I? I might as well thank a blank wall for all the meaning it would have.)
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years 9 months ago

mmm, I didn't comment directly, did I?

what to to say? Brilliantly crafted, highly intelligent and I happen to agree wholeheartedly. Perhaps in this case the nomination to Spotlight is sufficient. What are your initial impressions of this new system, Chuck? Cheers, Jess
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 9 months ago

Although any system ...

... can be gamed, this new setup's a significant improvement over what's gone heretofore. I for one appreciate the difference(s). Thanx again, Chuck