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M
michael
Jul 08, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

I Miss You

I miss you so much I don’t know where to start, I miss you so much it hurts my heart. I miss you more than you will know, I miss your warm-hearted nature and your lovely glow. I miss your sparkling eyes and your dazzling smile, And the fact you make my life all worth-while. I miss you so much that I want to cry, I miss you so much that I might just die. I miss you because you are so nice to me, I miss you not a little, but absolutely. I miss you so much that I feel a lot of pain, I miss you so much it drives me insane. I miss you so much more than I should, I promise I would stop this if only I could. I miss you more than words can ever say, I miss you more and more everyday.
— michael, Jul 08, 2009

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themoonman

themoonman

16 years 11 months ago

Hi Loser...

not a very good name for yourself, although we are all losers throughout our lives many times... so, to each his own. this poem, the repetitive words are too much for me... makes your missing seem trite to me and I don't think that is what you wanted. With a little work you could improve this poem so as to allow the reader to engage in the "missing". just one man's opinion on your poem, and merely a suggestion. Richard
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 11 months ago

If you Could

just cut down on the litany of "I miss you" in many places it would really help the reading of this piece. Keep working on it as I believe the piece has merit. For example, instead of: I miss you more than you will know, I miss your warm-hearted nature and your lovely glow. how about: I miss you more than you will know, your warm-hearted nature and your lovely glow. Always, Cat