VISE GRIP

'You enthrall me with your thoughts
you whip me with your whispers
even one sentence said
leaves me excoriated with pleasure
- tiny tingling blisters

You move me with your Mind
you meet me in tiny measures
gestures from your touch
such troves of treasure -
I value you beyond too much

You tower over me from above
find me ever lost in love
straining upward for your protection
leaning longingly
beyond my own projections

Yours is the love I cannot tame.
You are the candle I judge by its flame
Yours is the vise grip upon my heart.
Your hold is the one from which
I can neither leave nor depart....

— Bonitaj, Jun 30, 2009

About the Author

Region, Country: Tip of Southern Africa, ZAF

Favorite Poets: Too many to narrow down, but briefly :, AUDEN, T.S. ELIOT, DICKENSON, RILKE, THOREAU, RUMI ... the list is endless. Am inspired by many, especially those that live lives of "quiet desperation, and go to the grave with a song still in them" (THoreau)

Critiques

faerybeki

17 years ago

I really like this, I had to

I really like this, I had to look up excoriated ( I love having to do this btw!) what a fabulous word! :) There's some great stuff in here, not sure the last stanza is as powerful as it's predecessors but think adding a '.' on end of penultimate line might help (which is strange as I don't use a lot of them myself) :) Great write, I enjoyed the read :) much love b x

Bonitaj

17 years ago

vice grip

Hullo faerybekion: Really glad you stopped by! By your critique I take it you mean "put a fullstop at the end of the penultimate line?" Yes! and No! What I'm trying to say is just that "Your love is the one I can never leave or depart FROM" so I best add that in there. Was trying not to but guess it changes the meaning if I don't Good point! Ta (meaning THANKS!) Boni j ps yipee! Didn't have to after all - changed it though - see what you think now :) lol

poetrylove11

17 years ago

very powerful. Loved it

very powerful. Loved it :) "- tiny tingling blisters" was my favorite line. I love it because its somewhat of an oxymoron, with tingling creating a positive sensation while blisters does just the opposite. "You tower over me from above"- I take it to mean God or some other powerful divine force? just clarifying.

Bonitaj

17 years ago

poetrylove11

Hello there: So good to have you drop by as I have read some of your impressive work before. Glad you enjoyed this read. Just to clarify my intent in this poem - No higher power in this except a love interest. If you read closely - as you noticed with the oxymoron - there's almost an underlying element of masochism particularly in that line. "I value you beyond too much" again suggests an imbalance in roles and an 'idealization of the Other' (love this concept in psychology!!!) Finally in the closing verse - there is a quiet resignation that admits - whatever the pain or indeed because of it (vise grip) "I can neither leave nor depart". Hope that clears things up a bit. Must admit to liking this one too - spilled out in about 10minutes! Talk about inspiration! Boni j

poetrylove11

17 years ago

:)

ok, I got it now. I had that feeling from the poem but some lines threw me off. Funny enough, I have a friend who wrote a poem similar to this that was about God. Again, I loved it!

Bonitaj

17 years ago

VICE GRIP

Hi again and thanks for coming back! Just thinking how one's own perception changes the view of things. Asked a friend of mine in New Zealand to give me a suitable title for this and she suggested INVISIBLE LOVE! Boy! there's nothing invisible about this one! Interesting how she sees it as a gossamer thread - gentle and fragile...Yes it is - but not in this poem! Appreciate your comments as always! Boni

poetrylove11

17 years ago

Hi again!

And now my mind is delving into the idea of perception...perhaps I shall write a poem about it :) Liz

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