THE PENDULUM

I like the imagery here, and think that the poem is really great. I would love to see it rearranged, maybe like this: Like a pendulum she sits perched in her particular place Sickle moon in a starless sky no light about but her beige beauty purposefully framed by darkness, just doing her duty. She seems still yet so shall she not remain she is forced by nature’s friction to swing so slowly, invisibly - back and forth into equilibrium again. So it is with us we’re framed by a darkening sky, standing motionless by intent yet filled with desire A riveting call a move that must transpire and yet we remain stationary- Inept just waiting to expire…. I think it might highlight the parallelism of the stanzas, just a suggestion though... Oh, and there is one line I thought a little clumsy in comparison to the others, line 7. She seems to sit still, yet she will not remain (?) I have a feeling that this is not what you were trying to say, but please do reconsider this line. Regards, Ink Dragon