MAUSOLEUM TO THE MADNESS

Well written little poem. Only problem I have is that with so many line breaks, it reads awkwardly, cause there's so many pauses in between reading. Maybe you could make certain lines into verses instead of having them stand alone. I don't know if you did that intentionally to add to the demented feel of the poem, or what. But it might be easier to read if you put it into certain verses. Here's a suggestion: “Lucid light reverberating off the edges of sanity the building stands slate-stoned cold grey marble. She leans inside staring out of lost windows. Dew trickles down from frosty panes mirroring her squandered self seeping. Her inner world is jaggered, words jar, voices jumble. Doctors, orderlies, nurses all stumble to right her crooked soul from being dispossessed, deranged. They whisper “Psychosis”! “Splitting! Projections - borderline obsessions!” “Medicate” such muted mumblings, she hears only “Mutilate!” As she turns to flee she senses a slipping of reality’s rope as it falls from her hand…” Otherwise, I really liked how you wrote this. You used some awesome words to describe the "insanity" "mental disorder", "deranged", "dispossessed", "jaggered", all great words to use. Well done. Look forward to seeing more of yours. Peace n Love Katie

This has a good rythm to it and I enjoyed the sounds, the contents are disturbing and well put, we feel the fear of the patient, a good poem here. Yours Ann of Norway Did you mean to put MaDDness- instead of madness?

I must be mad to have forgotten les étoiles mon vieux, You know that mad means food in Danish, here's food for thought Bonita J Mahal. Scusi, perdone, pardon, unnskyld, Ann fra Norge

cold-grey... I think it might need the hyphen, or not... fact is this was an excellent write... the fall into psychosis described so richly, believably, I thought it was very good... very damn good!!! or maybe I've been there... hmmmmmm lol... loved the title too... Richard