Bonitaj

Jun 09, 2009 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

AS THE DAY UNFOLDS..

You chide me now with a
a worthy word.
Logic seems redundant -
the world remains absurd .

But remember this as the day unfolds
I didn’t choose the time
I never knew the place.

I merely felt the longing -
the need to embrace.
The moment held such magic ...
Memories
time will never erase.

— Bonitaj, Jun 09, 2009

About the Author

Region, Country: Tip of Southern Africa, ZAF

Favorite Poets: Too many to narrow down, but briefly :, AUDEN, T.S. ELIOT, DICKENSON, RILKE, THOREAU, RUMI ... the list is endless. Am inspired by many, especially those that live lives of "quiet desperation, and go to the grave with a song still in them" (THoreau)

Critiques

Candlewitch

17 years 1 month ago

Hello

I think the title is good (and I'm really bad at titles, myself, lol) I like the language useage and the pacing carries right along. I like the theme, too. The ending makes me feel like I am missing something, such as a contention between the writer and the one the poem was written to. I enjoyed reading. Always, Cat

Bonitaj

17 years 1 month ago

As the day unfolds

Gee Cat! I feel so priviledged getting feedback from you! Thank you so much for your positive comments as well as your rating! :) Not quite sure I know what you mean by the last comment i.e. a contention between writer and poet? Do elaborate and maybe I can enlighten in the poem itself! Thanks again! Bonitaj

Lonnie

17 years 1 month ago

I think I like it!

Haven't read anything by you before, but if this is an indication of what you are capable of, I believe you'll go far! Nice 'Feel' to this piece, and wonderful inner depth! I am impressed!

Bonitaj

17 years 1 month ago

As the day unfolds

Lonnie! Art certainly adds to LIFE! or as the MEYER GOLDWYN MEYER symbol shows:the reverse as well : LIFE ADDS TO ART! Thank you for your rating! You're a sensitive man after my own heart :) Now watch this space! Bonita j

Bonitaj

17 years 1 month ago

As the day unfolds

Hi Cat! Tis I. I worked on that last line or two - see if that gives better closure now as I'm a lot happier too! Thanks again! Bonita j

Candlewitch

17 years 1 month ago

Wow

Much better! I'll change my rating to five stars! Always, Cat

Bonitaj

17 years 1 month ago

As the day unfolds

"curious" Cat: Howzat for a new name? If it hadn't been for your probing the finer points of this poem - I might have just flunked my grades!!! But seriously I AM DELIGHTED!!! THank you so much - this is a 1st and I'm beside myself! 'WHEN THE PUPIL IS READY THE TEACHER APPEARS!" Thank you! Bonitaj

themoonman

17 years 1 month ago

Boni...

Hi, I see you've attracted attentions with your fine poeming... well written!! so I am not surprised... Richard

Bonitaj

17 years 1 month ago

As the day unfolds

dear dear Richard Do you ever sleep? does my mind not race? my happy heart weep? THank you! Bonitaj

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