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OUTSIDE HEAVEN'S GATE

OUTSIDE HEAVEN’S GATE ( Inspired by this anonymous quote:"If you aren't  in over your head,how do you know how tall you are?") If Passions don't consume youTill you’re satiated and fed,Where will you choose to lie? Languishing listlessly-among  the half dead?  Always meagre in your portionstaking small and smaller sips.   Scorning the world with envy                                                                          - with your scowling looks !  What a mean and miniscule measure -To take  from Lifesuch paltry pleasure. Oh you idiots still wasting Time! squandering Love in  her glorius prime. Amassing possessions, ever creating obsessionsto fill the chasm inside. When will you realize it's not too late ?Heedlessly  standing
just outside
Heaven's gate.
 
Bj June 7, '09




  
— Bonitaj, Jun 07, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Tip of Southern Africa, ZAF

Favorite Poets: Too many to narrow down, but briefly :, AUDEN, T.S. ELIOT, DICKENSON, RILKE, THOREAU, RUMI ... the list is endless. Am inspired by many, especially those that live lives of "quiet desperation, and go to the grave with a song still in them" (THoreau)

More from this author

Critiques

yenti

yenti

17 years ago

Bonitaj

A vision of insecurity that loses sight of reality portrayed quite well, just felt that in using your long words, you were making things a little untidy and for the nomal reader, there would be dictionary pauses, then again would they do so or would they abandon a good poem ??? Good theme and very good write, Yours Ian.T
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

17 years ago

OUTSIDE HEAVEN'S GATE

Hi Ian: Thanks so much for "Telling it like it is" I understand what you're saying about the vocab. but if that's how the poem came to me - I'd rather not water it down. Besides what of the "lovely" words like FECKLESS. Here I agree with Robert Browning "AH BUT A MAN'S REACH SHOULD EXCEED HIS GRASP - OR WHAT'S A HEAVEN FOR!" ( i.e. Raise the Bar!) In essence what I meant to say may not be that clear and that's where I'll grant you some leeway and be most delighted for new insights! The message is thus: LIVE WITH PASSION - IT'S RIGHT THERE WITHIN YOUR GRASP! YOU ARE STANDING AT HEAVEN'S GATE!! Thanks Bonitaj
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 12 months ago

OUTSIDE HEAVEN'S GATE

Hi Ian: Now that I've finally got down from my HIGH HORSE - make that "Fallen" - I have rivised the poem extensively and I hope it's more to your liking! Please take a look again. I would be most delighted to have renewed feedback! Thanks Bonitaj
themoonman

themoonman

17 years ago

Boni...

this is rich! I've been doggy paddling so long I'm apt to succumb at any time now... lol.... very good my new found friend... Richard
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

17 years ago

OUTSIDE HEAVEN'S GATE

Thank you Richard!! I'm still "going for gold" and one day I'll reach the 5 Star mark! Hope you'll be one of my good friends to celebrate with me!! Cheers Boni j