Truths (edited)

Greetings Inky, more bone than meat I fear, too long and too tedious for moi, I think there is a poem idea in there somewhere, apologies for the negative reply, BG. The pope is dead we will have another one soon he too will die.

Dearest Nina, please don't take my comment personally, I have read many comments at this new place and frankly they don't all encourage improvement, maybe you should not have ticked the box that said 'I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back' you should have ticked the box that said 'stroke my ego' apologies again Inky, did not set out to offend you. BG The pope is dead we will have another one soon he too will die.

Wie sind Sie? Ihr Englisch ist sehr gut. Ich lebte eine Zeit lang in Wien, aber mein Deutsch ist fast alles vergessen. Also werde ich meine Kommentare in englischer Sprache. There are various theories in cosmetology and physics which imagine other parallel existences which we have trouble seeing. So the theories remain, for the time being, theories. These are just some of the many hooks that we can use to hang a hat which might be called "meaninglessness, the absence of any truth". Another such hook is death. During times of rebellion, cultured by adolescence, many important challenges to established notions are explored. I prefer to argue for acknowledgment of paradigms of truth - the practical and accepted truths of an engaged and percolating society - the truths which serve survival and beauty in some reasonably straightforward ways. In this regard, I have little time for evangelical nihilism, libertarianism or anarchy. Those all sound too much like Kool-ade recipes for Jonestown. Thus, I find the purpose of the poem to be begging. I didn't have to write this and discretion argued against. But such writing is the only way I know to treat you with the seriousness I believe you deserve. Brian

Being as it was early in the day (for me, anyway) the length didn't really bother me - you were able to hold my attention throughout, and the way they were broken up was executed well. I couldn't help but feel that a couple of lines had a sort of cliche feel to them, but there were other strong ones to make up for them. ~Jess K. ----------------------- "So I open my door to my enemies, and ask could we wipe the slate clean? But they tell me to please go fu** myself; you know you just can't win" - Pink Floyd

With out wishing to look like I'm stroking your ego Nina, I like this, it seems to have an honest flow, a representation of your thought pattern perhaps, I have a few of these snappy streams of consciousness pieces but never sure where to post them, they're quite random and they ramble, which I see this one may have before editing :) All in all I think it's a thought provoking piece Nina, good job, much love b xx

it escapes your notice, Nina, you might enjoy my response to methodist above. Although you claim no offense, he sure got under my skin. I've got a thing for bullies, I guess. Didn't like them in schoolyards. Don't like them now. Yours, Chuck

Hi Nina, Enjoyed the poem because it simply makes you stop and think! Good challenges to the ideas of truth. The toddler analogy I thought was good enough without the need for explanation. I have to admit that I am one of those folks who believes that truth can be in the eye of the beholder and sometimes we can choose to "see" it or not. I also think there is Truth out there to be found...in fact I think Truth is a person. More food for thought. nice job, Nate

Truth... a great theme! there are universal truths like, we all will die one day after suffering the beauty and pain of living I like how you point out that truth is often ones own... indeed it is... one line... incorruptible... justice is corruptible or did I read it wrong? I liked the question about the eye opener... but I think it could be answered with a mirror... enjoyed reading the poem and the comments as well... Richard

I think everyone has their own opinion. I think this was well written, and honesty and truth is always the best policy. We need more of it in this world. One cannot trust the other because of untruths that role of people's tongues. My heart gives you two thumbs up. This was a great poem and not to long, the way you wrote it. Take care my friend! Keep on writing!! Peace, Pixee

Stupid computers! Had my comment all typed out and poof it disappeared... Anyway - I arrived too late and missed the original version to be able to see the difference as discussed above. So I can only comment on this one... I enjoyed it. I don't feel it is too long. It has length, but trimmed down nicely with few words. The words chosen have impact. You don't need fillers/fluff. Less is more thing going on. I can't thing of any suggestions to add, change, rearrange, nor remove. Much love my friend. Live, Laugh and Love (and don't forget to write) Tink

The definition of truth in the broadest sense is : the actual state of existance of all things. Poetry that directly deals with moralistic issues is rarely accepted in general venues such as this.I would have liked to have seen the origional drafts as they were probably chipped away by popular opinion. The first lines are an oxymoron If you say all truth is a lie. Then it rationaly follows that the statement that you just made is a lie. which is rationally illogical.There must be a base truth from which to proceed.A rational beggining point but philosopical arguments along these lines amuse me.Though they are dangerous in the sense that they preclude any moral standard of human conduct. Blind guardian: A reference to justice. So you see your poem takes a facinating twist unto itself an immediate contradiction that is real of our perception. I love that. Stanza 2 In a sense this is very true to me becouse man tends to corrupt the highest ideals of truth particularly in his interpretation of the bible The puritan fathers going around like mourners in dark colors.and oppression of woman. Stanza 3 Which is a possitive. The Ideal characterazation of justice.swings the pendulum to the positive aspect. Stanza 4&5 Relate to two negetive human conditions. Swinging the pendulem again To the negative The final stanza characterizes the conclusion of the matter : Truth is a personal matter and maybe there are no universal truths. Honestly as a work of poetry it needs to be developed into a format that engages the reader on a diferent level. As the pom is it's pretty flat. It lacks reading appeal. people in general don't give a shit about truth presented as a moral delema. If you want to get a point like this accross you have to add the entertainment factor. This poem is to dry. Imagine yourself sitting in a waiting room and opening it up and a piece of paper falls out and the words of your poem are written on it. What would your reaction be? Be honest with yourself.What I do is constantly review and rewrite till I feel I can't improve it any further. Somtimes you have to take the germ or the soul of the poem and consider what it really means to you on a gut and intellectual level. Somtimes we need to just sit on it till a future time.I think it has the heart of what may be one of your best poems . Keep it fresh. B. P.s Please forgive my spelling and grammar as I have educational deficets.

Sisters of mercy really rock. You did/nt have any trouble finding the beat and rythem with that percussion. Somtimes I like to turn it on the headphones and just let it all explode in my head.It's a great controlled release.Marriage now thats intimidating!Been there done that and yet I survived. Now i'm bullet proof. A heard of widebeasts could be comming through the kitchen ,and I wouldn't lower the coffee cup from my lips. B I always think of you when I put the ' on its.Isn't that a nice way to be thought of? B

HOW did you find that clip to so neatly fit your point. I want to be able to do that! That was so funny. only the irreverant english could think of that, And no I don't think of you that way.A bit sad though . I have a strong affinity for the African people. Hot-dogs for dinner - cheap meal. I think (it's) healthier to leave them out, and let some mold grow on them, and throw away the hot dogs and eat the mold. Now isn't that a tasty thought, and you thought you were gonna affect me with Sisters of Mercy .I have a new hidden weapon to make you laugh uncontrollably at any given time ,,,,,,,, (it's) and you know you will.The video will automaticly pop into your head. Oh you shouldn't have done that.You will have to exhibit iron self control. B

You must really see somthing of yourself in that video .It's funny when some dichotomy of ides is brought together in a creative imaginitive way how our sense of humor is brought into play I think humor is as important to us as food (almost), and life is so without a wonderfully engaging componant when it is absent.I think it ties us to our childhood, and is universal, and fundamental.I think there is a poem or two that poks fun at us in there somewhere. B

How do you like this one I created it becouse my sister was bitching about her hemroids :The character speaks --- Doc Prock: My mother never forgave me. She wanted me to be a proctologist but she couldn't get me off my ass. Do you think (its) lame N