Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

The Early Dawn

The clock measuring my very being
was registering a pre-dawn hour,

very cool was the air surrounding me
and the morning dew did glisten in the darkness.

The birds presented themselves and began chirping
as if their voices were the true soundtrack to the dawn,

That's when her soft, smokey eyes found mine
and we searched ever inward, exploring each other.

As the sky brightened with the arrival of my sun,
the shadows briefly held their last dance of the night,

and then began to evaporate and dissipate
just as smoke would surely disappear in a breeze,

We became all knowing of each other's existences
and ours were the morning shadows that mattered.

For we two had completely become one, unto ourselves,
and thus there was created, the early dawn of our hearts !
— docmaverick, May 29, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: The High Desert, in the wild west, southern California, U.S. of A.., USA

Favorite Poets: Keates, Poe, Dickinson, and Dr. Seuss. There are a smattering of others, but why bother listing 'em all, ya know?, I also rely on a few of our poets, here....for advice, and what not. I couldn't possibly explain what a fountain of live, effective knowledge we have...right here in our midst ! To catch a glimmer of brilliance, merely visit: the Stream.

More from this author

Critiques

AW

Antoinette Mar…

17 years ago

aha...Doc

For sure a Love match of the heart....enjoyed it!
weirdelf

weirdelf

17 years ago

Way too wordy, my friend,

you lose the immediacy of the moment. It feels poetically contrived. Especially that second stanza, that sounds like Yoda waxing poetical. I'm going to do something against the rules and edit it savagely, you choose what to take and what to leave to retain your own vision. The clock of my being told a pre-dawn hour, the air was cool and the morning dew glistened. The birds began their soundtrack to dawn, Her soft, smokey eyes found mine and we explored each other, ever inward. As the sky brightened the shadows briefly held their last dance of the night, [great line!] and began to dissipate as smoke disappears in a breeze, We came to know each others existences and ours were the shadows that mattered. [meaning: will your shadows dissipate too?] For we had become one, unto ourselves, and there was created, the early dawn of our hearts [really that ! has got to go, if the poem doesn't say ! no numbers of !s will] cheers, Jess Forever unwrapping the eternal present.
docmaverick

docmaverick

17 years ago

Of course not....

...when I say that, "ours are the shadows that matter, it means that those are the ones you can count on. doc.