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Temptress of Time

As a consequence of a daydream
(Once again I could not slumber !)
the muse has swept in took my hand
has an idea ! A tricksters plan …

Pondering the stars
as you wander in
Dream pushing and
prodding all
my whims
but your visage
took reason
threw me on the ground
made me wake
look all around


"You rock with the hand of ages
Roll on the will of the gods"
your form
isn't of our realm
but is a fold of never
an open page of maybe
all around me
a reach away
I swear
feeling you
I am


Oblivious
to the
deeper meaning
for you
passing days
have no form
as my heart leaps
we be coupled
infinity beckons
a bustling room
to the love
and luster
that is you


Making me shiver
the wanton disregard
depraved indifference
a thrust of tomorrow
the end of a beginning
temptress of time
flitting in
and flying away
never far to stray


Never still long
trouble wont find her
no earthly thing
could ever bind her
eternity paid
her forever wing
she is the song
cherubs sing


My enemy
and friend in one mold
a companion freely
Time has me in her hold …

— Seren, May 28, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

More from this author

Critiques

B

Bosscombat

17 years ago

:)

top marks yo i feel weird sittin right next to ya commenting :p shibby shibby cocoanut shibby shibby pie awesome works :0 <3
B

bjp

17 years ago

Dear Jayne-Chloe,

This does seem like a poem about freedom. You are writing here with your forearm at your side, unready to protect. So you know already that that is what poetry requires. There is sex in the cadence alone. Did you imagine it would be heard (not, of course no, not in a bustling room). So much so, that there are blushes a thousand miles long. Your voice is vented from a crowd of minds, in which your imagined image is beheld. And here is the good of envy, that the courage infuses onward. What a pleasure, Brian
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

Brian

I couldn't sleep ... and well this popped into my head it does need a little work... but that will come in the editing ... I write for myself mostly that others derive some pleasure from it is an added bonus much love Jayne-Chloe x
yenti

yenti

17 years ago

Seren

Your Bro is biased but I will say in the right direction as this piece was excellent and great to read, time the enemy of man etc: but it is man made so we know who to blame, lol, are you having that Bro put stars in your eyes as the eyes have it, You both take care there and our thoughts are with you, Ian.T
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

Well ... what are friends for .. lol

Matt /Bosscombat is on tour with his band at the moment just happened to call in at 4am this morning ... I call him brother though we are not tied by blood he is the closest thing I have to one ... One thing about Matty if he dont like something he usually lets me know .. the joy of Matty is the fact he wont lie to me and tell me falsehoods ... he will always be a loved part of my family ... glad you enjoyed this , it was a whim in the middle of the night just thought I'd share it , didnt actually edit it yet per se as I had to go to hospital at 6am this morning so didnt really have time ... Hopefully with a couple of rewrites it will improve ... Love J
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

Julie

This was very rough write ... Still fiddling with a few ideas in my head for this ... But I really agree with most of your change's they do improve it ... My punctuation has always been horrific being a teacher I should have studied harder but I was more interested in performing and maths ... Over time with a little study I am sure this will improve , thanks so much for the critique and I do agree with all of your changes and I'll try and pick up my game on the grammer side of things ... I am sure with your help I will improve (hugz) Much Love Jayne x
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

LOL dont be sad hun its a

LOL dont be sad hun its a known fact my spelling and grammer are well HORRIFIC but I have words in my heart with your help and a few others I really have improved my writing hun ((( hugz ))) and never ever feel bad hun this place and you people are wonderful ... Its nice to find people enjoying my writing never thought I was any great shakes at it to be honest (though i do love writing lyrics for songs) so in effect have been writing just another form... to be honest thats why my poetry lines about 40 journals over thirty years ... but none of it compares to the things I've writen and been inspired to write since I've been here at neopoet ... (hug) with much love Jayne x x
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

Julie

HMmmmmmmm ill have a look at it again and hopefully I can split it up into better stanza'z I think that's where its lacking .... maybe not enough defined stanza's I dont know ... this one is doing my head in I know what I want ? ... but cant quite get the feel I'm trying for ... maybe i'll leave it for a few days and come back with a different perspective ... maybe that will work lol ... Thank you so much for rereading this ... I needed another set of eyes to look at it hubby is way to biased I am going to show him a blank piece of paper one day and see if he says thats awesome as well lol ... much love Jayne x