Odyssey

Entangled in the web of time Left to the dark corners of life All that is left is your fading smile Loneliness does with me as it pleases These four walls hear me call your name No one answers and I sit in much despair To your loving arms is there a path If there is can you tell me where it starts Will I pass through the city of betrayal? How about that long bridge of denial Tell me of the mountains of internal fears Will this path lead me to your palaces? Queen of hearts may I be your knight To protect you from this cold world Guide me with your harmonious voice Look after me as this path I endure The coldest of winters are worth A moment with my sweet penelope

— paul, May 26, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New York, USA

Favorite Poets: Cavafi, Sylvia Plath and Neopoet as a whole.

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Critiques

Morgana Tragic…

17 years ago

Yaaaaaaaay again Paul

OK, so I didn't really get the whole Odyssey thing until you explained it to me, but even without you explaining it, I thought it was a lovely poem. (missing some punctuation- "Queen of hearts may I be your knight To protect you from this cold world? Otherwise, you have some really powerful lines here, some great imagery, You really have a true romantic in you, greek boy. Peace N Love Katie

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Paul,

I am having a really hard time trying to catch up with all your recent posts. Your muse must be working overtime... This piece has a great title, theme and beginning, but sadly doesn't live up to that promise in each line. (E.g. l.6 " No one answers and I sit in much despair", which feels a little clumsy.) The final two lines pick up the greatness of the beginning again, but I do wish the other ones in between were as good. There are some glimpses of good ideas in there, I liked the city of betrayal, bridge of denial, mountains of internal fears, but then you arrive at "palaces". Just palaces. Not "palaces of love" or "palaces of bliss" or even just "golden palaces". What are those palaces like, Paul? Why does Ulysses yearn for them? We need an explanation! Just my thoughts, hope you will find a way to enhance this piece, I really like the underlying idea a lot. (By the way, I wrote a poem in which I mentioned Ulysses and Penelope, too, it's "Between years", would love to hear your opinion on that one.) Yours, ~Nina