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I’m in the process of submitting poems to magazines and therefore deleting them. They may be up again later.

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I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Thanks, Ann,

actually, I have just come back to adjust my "upside down" part, and would be grateful for another look. Glad to be back, ~Nina
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 11 months ago

ME TOO!!!! Love it!!! Now

ME TOO!!!! Love it!!! Now where did I put my quiver? No not that one! Lovely & ingenious poem! ~A "No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment of punishment." Article 5 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Thanks, Anna,

I have just returned from your "Inner flame" that shines so beautifully in the spotlight. Glad you love my little poem, my friend. Yours, ~Nina
A

Arrow

16 years 11 months ago

I love this, too but

it does seem a little unfinished. I wonder what you were either going to do with the stars or in the utter darkness created when they fell. Also, if Diana can bring down the stars from the abyss, why does she need mere mortal me to notice? (not a criticism, just a reflection). She seems a little vulnerable. Maybe that was intended.
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Well, Arrow,

the vulnerability of Diana is intended here, but you're right, I should have let the story unfold a little more. I will try. Thanks for your honest criticism. Yours, ~Nina
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Wow, Julie,

thank you so much! I will try to expand, so you can enjoy a longer version. Yours, ~Nina
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 11 months ago

Oh Nina, Nina

I am not so moved by the position of the moon now, I just loved its kinky little shape and am now extra sad that I didn't take a copy while she was there in that phase of your creation. Sorry if my comment is now a little ass-ymetrical but its funny little shape in fact gave it a grace it hasn't got, that of strangeness mixed with the obvious; I had better not embroider more on this cloth of words as I have overdone it already? Not against you adding more to this evocative little work of art. I still miss that quirky eye-catching cheese rind...oh Nina you have got my mind going in a direction that excites me, enough to mention it here as I have not yet developed the idea, thank you for that too. Happy to see/hear you back with us again too!! Yours as aye Ann of Norway
faerybeki

faerybeki

16 years 11 months ago

Yes Nina, magic as expected

Yes Nina, magic as expected :) no you don't miss do you? but I missed you! Had a look at your revisions, I like 'upside down' in both formats, the first echoes the cresent moon beautifully and the second gives the upside down itself added power, depends which image you want to emphasise I suppose. really loved it and would happily read more, although it does stand wonderfully as it is! well, i'm not much help am I? lol but I am jubilant at your return :) much love b xx
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Beki, sweet fairy,

I feel jubilant, too, not least because of your flattering comment! Much love, ~Nina P.S. I settled for the second version, because I think it mirrors the "tossing" from the line above. What do you think? Ann liked the other version better...
faerybeki

faerybeki

16 years 11 months ago

Nina, as I said I like both

Nina, as I said I like both versions, they both work, for me, but slightly differently, yes, I can see the second version mirroring 'tossing' with it's dramatic ups and downs, it looks almost wave like on the page :) I think Nina, you're a dear poetess and should make the decision that works best for you and your delightful little poem! See? told you I wasn't much help! lol more love b xx
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Well,

I think I will stick to my second version and the "tossing" of the letters. Thanks, Beki, for getting back to me about this, it does help to hear someone else's thoughts. Yours, ~Nina
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

16 years 11 months ago

Nina

Interesting use of the visuals, and especially liked the closing lines of the poem. ~Jess K. ----------------------- "So I open my door to my enemies, and ask could we wipe the slate clean? But they tell me to please go fu** myself; you know you just can't win" - Pink Floyd
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Jess!

Good to hear from you. I have been away for a while, due to lack of time. Will have to check out your new things. The closing lines...I must admit I like them, too. But I am still trying to find something else to make this piece grow. Not sure if it is finished... Yours, ~Nina
O

orgami

16 years 11 months ago

like the simplicity of the peice

it doesnt stumble just goes for the lyrical facts and if it werent for the damned clouds and cool nights one would be out there (I was one) looking up at the shapes of the heavenly bodies are we worthy mice even on the face of this great home?? I like your writing very much though I may not have commented lately I move about and settle back again in revolutions but this once charmed me sweetly so! it did! it did.....
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Orgami!

No problem, I haven't posted much for some time now. And I still have to find out what you've been up to. It's always a pleasure to get a comment from you. It is often more poetic than my poems! Yours, ~Nina
Cloudthings

Cloudthings

16 years 11 months ago

Nina I LOVE this it is so beautiful, just divine

Nina I LOVE this it is so beautiful, just divine. May I offer one little weeny suggestion (no probs if you ignore at all)... When I read the line "I turn into..." I thought for a moment it was a directional expression, I wonder if it would sound better as "I become Diana"? Lovely write Nina xxx~ Anni ~~~ "Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it's what you are expected to give -- which is everything." -Anon
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Hi Anni,

actually, I thought of using "become", it is in my original draft. How funny that you thought of it, too. Somehow, I felt it was too weak and settled on "turn into". I'll try and rethink that line. Thanks for the constructive crit! Yours, ~Nina
Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

Proprietress o…

16 years 11 months ago

butting in...

I am Diana. it is stronger than both, still poetic, the read is softer and stronger at the same time. just my opinion for what it's worth...
B

barbsdad2003

16 years 11 months ago

Exquisite, the whole

The intriguing placement of e d i d s o p w u n brings me special pleasure ... and a smile. Thanx, Chuck
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Chuck,

glad it made you smile! Your "peer" poem was a pleasure to read, so I am happy to have returned the favour. Yours, ~Nina
Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

Proprietress o…

16 years 11 months ago

comeback deluxe.

I am sorry I did not come to this sooner. the end and beginning are so poetic, so... NinaDragonFire&Flames. I feel that the sudden picture in the poem disturbs the magic. but I see that others enjoyed it greatly, so I will count that as my personal taste. as for the rest, ahhh, so much beauty and strength. I love how you combine fragility with strong forces. I am looking forward to more of your new poetry. I sense a change in style... very exciting! your Proprietress
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Deluxe?

Oh, Kata, I don't know. I feel this poem still wants to grow... "I am Diana"... I will think about this, it is definitely a good alternative to "become" or "turn into". Thanks! Yours, ~Nina
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Ha, Julie,

great minds think alike, I was thinking of using "evolve" all day, but have meanwhile arrived at a new idea that I hopefully will be able to get to work by this evening. Thanks for your suggestions! Yours, ~Nina
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 11 months ago

Shall I join the fray?

And say ( I am the goddess Diana, the solitary hunter, the virgin sorceress, ) ? ............................ Was it that night you saw them falling? Yours Nina from Ann of Norway
D

Darby Cain

16 years 11 months ago

sounds good to me

But this is coming from complete noob darby cain
Seren

Seren

16 years 11 months ago

Bravo !!

Cant believe I Missed this Nina ... I LOVED IT !!!! ... Awesom write !! speachless to be honest ... Much love Jayne x
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Blanka,

it is an interesting thought, I will try to space it a little more. Sadly, the poem field doesn't always oblige, it seems to ignore some spaces... Many thanks, ~Nina
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 11 months ago

When a poem feels

When a poem feels =unfinished- it's only because the reader has to fill in the missing details. That's what makes a good poem, great! Love, Anna "You begin saving the world by saving one person at a time; all else is grandiose romanticism or politics." Charles Bukowski
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

In fact, Anna,

I do think of this one as "finished" as far as the words themselves are concerned... Thank you, my spiritual friend, for reminding me that the journey can be the destination. Love, ~Nina
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 11 months ago

This is top now Nina

I love it and can just see you floating upside down in the firmament joining the godesses and gods in their journeys across the sky, I shall look out for you next time I have a telescope, you will end-up there among the stars. I am still fond of the asymmetrical odd little star cluster, but this looks good as it is here, I like the asymmetrical symmetry of things. My admiration for your new role and good wishes to it bringing you great happiness. Love from Ann of Norway
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Thanks, my dear Ann,

for giving this a reread. Hope you are having better spring weather up North then we have here, so you can go on your beloved walks and look at the stars at night. My stars are hiding behind clouds these days. Yours, ~Nina
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 11 months ago

=0

Enchanted words perfectly strung together to make olde time magick and pluck the strings of my heart! B E A U T I F U L! Always, Cat
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Cat,

thank you for bringing me a reason to smile. I feel honoured by your words. Yours, ~Nina
Seren

Seren

16 years 11 months ago

It is perfect as is Nina …

It is perfect as is Nina ... wish I could vote twice to be honest for this deserves it .... Much love Jayne x x
Cloudthings

Cloudthings

16 years 11 months ago

Lovely, as I first felt it was, nice excuse to reread though

Lovely, as I first felt it was, nice excuse to reread though xxx~ Anni ~~~ "I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in the kindness of human beings. I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven and angels." Pearl S. Buck:
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 11 months ago

Anni,

much obliged for the reread, thank you. Yours, ~Nina
L

Lunegirl

16 years 4 months ago

This opening is just so

This opening is just so beautiful Nina. i love the first two lines the most. ''A crescent moon, bleeding its soft light into the crimson sky A gust of wind, directionless, tossing a handful of invisibility'' Then the upside down thing you've down like the faling stars, its great. imagantive. vicki x
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 4 months ago

I Ching or an 'osteskalk'

Are you playing with the I Ching letting this, your moon struck-ness tumble the sticks onto the ground to divine the divine goddess? Each time becoming wiser or not? Or as the people in Telemark say the 'osteskalk' cheese rind. How many phases of this moon will there be and does it ever eclipse? "Watching the full moon a small hungry boy forgets to eat his supper."......................Basho We will all become moonstruck dear Nina, love from Ann of Norway
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 4 months ago

Why not, yes we could take

Why not, yes we could take the theme and embroider our own "Sampler", each with the same elements but each with their different stitching, creating a series of moon poems, the Neo-phases of the moon! Waxing and waning as it does, as it changes its shape, well we seem to see it changing its shape!!!! How magic she seems not lit by her own fires, cold and quietly glowing so white, like the snow, so majestically moving, her movement more visible than the sun as we can look at her without being blinded by her. Ah yes I will become moonstruck with you dear Nina any day. Love Ann P.S. But the title was shooting stars, that is another story!
H

hippiepoet69

16 years 3 months ago

I enjoyed it

descriptive. I need to be more descriptive like this. Thanks Ink Dragon. huey
I

Ink Dragon

16 years 3 months ago

Huey,

thank you for the visit. Glad you decided to stay. Will take a peek at your poems ASAP. Yours, ~Nina
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

found it

still loving it Nina, and yes, there is a diana in all of us ; ) xxx