Leaking destiny (Things I must forget )

Thanks darling Ann, this was so much fun to write, it just tumbled & tumbled & tumbled out. I liked that cryptic/symbolic stuff, it's such fun to shape the feelings with, like clay or plasticine, you can pull it all over the place, this one is about all kinds of things really, no one could ever decipher it I think, no matter how well they knew me, I like it that way today. I have my "webel" hat on... I say Hip Hurrah to everyone, life is amazing isn't it?! Much love dear one xxx~ Anni ~~~ "A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world; everyone you meet is your mirror." ~Ken Keyes, Jr.

Hi Tonya, I love reading your comments, on mine or anyones work, you always have an interesting angle (usually so eloquently described). Yes there's a lot in here, it felt like a wild ride, writing this, ,gorgeous though. Like I just opened the gate & all of this just came tumbling out wanting expression, it was kind of "hot" if you understand, like it had been ready too long & had been heating up ready to be birthed, the timing was good, it may have festered if left any longer, but here it is in all it's many incarnations, poking at life in a rather irreverent way really, yet there is a sober side to it... One thing though, just perspective, I don't feel any of it was wrong even the awful stuff, in some dreadful way it was necessary to become who I am (who we are... we need it to shift us into a possible better place).. Not that I'd wish awful stuff on anyone, but there's nothing that really moves you like adversity. In a way, this is just acknowledging it, not to make it wrong, but because it sometimes feels too big to keep inside. & maybe to bring perspective somehow? Anyway I am smiling lots that you should like it so much, so thank you, it is an odd write, I wasn't sure people would get it, or feel ok about it, it is one of those babies that I am instantly fond of, the down syndrome poem I had to have... I should have called it "Trisome 21", it is raw & honest & innocent in it's way, simple at heart, but different. Thanks again Tonya, so kind of you to leave such warm response, & so glad my "mad" gushing poem pleased you.~ Anni xx ~~~ "A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world; everyone you meet is your mirror." ~Ken Keyes, Jr.

Hey my red headed sister of the Ewoks, look again honey there is NOTHING conformist about Tori believe me, she was one of the movers & shakers of her time (& she is a red haired sister).. she is a weirdo of the BEST design & whilst it took me a bit to adjust (she does "girly dressing' to the extreme, nt my style, but she is brilliant brilliant, brilliant) I think if you actually listened to her sh would give you the power she gave me... I remember years back, my husband who used to beat mesaying he always got a bit worried when I put Tori on... she gave me strength & made me feel I had a voice & a worth that he had always tried to destroy (to make himself feel bigger silly man... poor man, I just feel sorry for him now), it's true, I began getting my strength back during that time & much of it was from the music of Tori & Natalie Merchant I do think you might enjoy this, there's an underlying darkness that may appeal (look up "My Skin" for Natalie: "Take a look at my body Look at my hands There's so much here that I don't understand Your face saving promises Whispered like prayers I don't need them Because I've been treated so wrong I've been treated so long As if I'm becoming untouchable Well contempt loves the silence It thrives in the dark With fine binding tendrils That strangle the heart They say that promises sweeten the blow But I don't need them, no I don't need them I've been treated so wrong I've been treated so long As if I'm becoming untouchable I'm the slow dying flower In the frost killing hour Sweet turning sour and untouchable Oh, I need the darkness The sweetness The sadness The weakness Oh, I need this I need a lullaby A kiss good night Angel sweet love of my life Oh, I need this I'm the slow dying flower In the frost killing hour Sweet turning sour and untouchable Do you remember the way that you touched me before All the trembling sweetness I loved and adored Your face saving promised whispered like prayers I don't need them Oh, I need the darkness The sweetness The sadness The weakness Oh, I need this I need a lullaby A kiss good night Angel sweet love of my life Oh, I need this Well is it dark enough Can you see me Do you want me Can you reach me Oh, I'm leaving You better shut your mouth And hold your breath If you kiss me now You'll catch your death Oh, I mean this Oh, I mean this" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1LegWs8xdc & for Tori, maybe Cornflake Girl? (reminds me a bit of you, & addresses the conformity thing too): Never was a cornflake girl Thought that was a good solution Hanging with the raisin girls She's gone to the other side Givin us a yo heave ho Things are getting kind of gross And I go at sleepy time This is not really happening You bet your life it is Peel out the watchword Just peel out the watchword She knows what's goin on Seems we got a cheaper feel now All the sweeties are gone Gone to the other side With my encyclopedia They musta paid her a nice price She's putting on her string bean love This is not really happening You bet your life it is Peal out the watchword Just peel out the watchword Never was a cornflake girl Thought that was a good solution Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl And the man with the golden gun thinks he knows so much Thinks he knows so much Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl " http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUseTonvkRs Don't mean to inundate you & I know it's ancient history to a young thing like you, but there was also wisdom in the "old days" LOve ya ta pieces Kelsey, hope you enjoy (if you find time). xx Anni ~~~ "A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world; everyone you meet is your mirror." ~Ken Keyes, Jr.

Hi Kata, I have changed it a little since your comment, I think for the better, it was intentionally all jumbled up not to make a great deal of sense, but I wanted to unravel just a bit of the jumble & have, I think it sits better now. It is a relatively new thing for me to go back & tweak my writing, it occurred to me just now I should write it & then leave it a few days before posting, then I wouldn't have to tweak it on site... but then I think I would be less likely to post since the feeling would be gone, I am farely immediate with my art I think. Anyway glad you like it & lovely to know another Tori fan (I had meant to comment on that before, but got distracted more than once regarding you & Tori). I love her, I feel she saved my life in a way (see my comment to Kelsey above). & yes, I feel for you not getting a concert, she comes to Australia more rarely I think, but is so worth seeing her in concert sigh. I have tried to convert poor Kelsey, I think she would actually find a kindred in Tori, the ability to delve into darkness for her art is definitely there. I shall go see what you have been up to tonight, thanks again Kata xx~ Anni ~~~ "A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world; everyone you meet is your mirror." ~Ken Keyes, Jr.