Shaking Dolls

Wow... & thanks for inviting interpretations, but first I just want to comment on the write. You write so powerfully Katia, I have been told on many occassions (mostly by lovers - she raises eyebrows commically!... well, because I feel like the ones that find me too intense are just not at the point of living's intensity I am, others manage really well), but you, with your poetry at least, are turned up another several decibels, I sometimes feel your writing rages through me & I have to pace myself... This is by NO means a criticism, it holds no good or bad, it is probably an amazing strength if anything, it is unique, & relatively rare, I would not for a moment suggest you should water it down. Your writing blazes, even the more quiet element burn with white hot verve. I guess I should also add, I love your use of words, you paint so boldly & creatively with them & leave us wide eyed in awe (me, anyway). Hmmm interpretation, I don't know that I'd want to pin it, but I do remember a sense,several times during reading this, that I feel I have a quiet life in comparison (many people would laugh, reading that, since they could not see me that way), I don't suffer such torment as seems to have inspired this. I guess that's an interpretation of sorts, this work seems to me to be almost a flailing tantrum, beginning quietly but with such intense desire that something did not go the way it should & so something is going to pay? I absolutely LOVED the imagery, in the 2nd & 3rd stanza's particularly, brilliant. The last 3 stanzas were also really well crafted, but on a personal level not so comfortable for me, (that's just my "softy, preferring comfort if possible" response, not part of a valid critique). I felt this was about a number of things, I find it hard to guess exactly what almost feel it would be rude if I were to do that. Great write though & thanks for inviting us to explore it, I feel we get to gleen the poem more deeply through doing so. Be well & sated Katia, volcano heart~ Anni ~~~ "Love has no desire but to fulfill itself. To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving". ~Kahlil Gibran

well then, finally I have a couple of suggestions for one of your writes... shadows merging become one... shadows merge becoming one... maybe flows a bit easier flustered, roused and downwards sinned flustered, roused and downward sinned... may just be me and my old country self, but putting the "s" stumbled me out loud... her sanity slips as she falls... her sanity slipping as she falls... seemed to need another syllable there... merely suggestions... but I thought I'd share them with you. Now, as to interpretations... like Anni, I am almost afraid to tag one on it... but I'll tell you what came to mind... a young girl, perhaps raised strictly, perhaps not by natural parents... with lots of issues, anger if you will... and the birth, being that of a conscious will to survive... now I'm sure I am way off... but you asked!!! Richard

Hi I have to agree with Richards comments and in addition I would have said, "five webs hang in the corner", and, "billowed in her sapphire reign". But that is me, my humble opinion. Who am I to criticize when I write such poor poetry? I would like to say though that your words scream torture and anguish! Regards Baz

I'll be brave and tell you what came to my mind. Don’t laugh… I put mother nature in the Picture. Perhaps a destruction of all she loves. Slamming raindrops breaking asphalt, causing the sun to disappear, speaks to me of some major catastrophe. I know it is metaphoric and not meant to be taken literally, but they are events out of her control. I would imagine a primal rebirth for her, would/ could cause extreme havoc with her sanity… I can envision a strange haze hovering in the air, and purple pain/ regal/queen of Earth? What new things will come of a new rebirth lol, just my imagination on your very creative writing. I think Richard has a good point, his suggestions do flow a bit smoother, easier to say. At first, I wasn’t sure I liked this line.. “flustered, roused and downwards sinned” But after really thinking about the poem I think It is an important one… it almost gives the hint of retribution, and suggests whatever new of earth forms, it is not going to be how it was before, but something much, much darker…perhaps due to mother natures insanity? lol. I like these kind of poems...turns on our creative thinking switch! Very nice Katia. Always Sincere, Tonya

and instead of keeping on typing out proprietress (Kata) is much easier, I picked on. My bad for getting it wrong. and ya know... i don't think i would change that line, it reflects so well with the ending, "shriveled heads and screams a-plenty cracks to roam a broken earth demons fly from lips a-parted embrace the stage of primal birth" right or wrong.. this verse reminds me of sin or results from some kind of sin. It was just a first impression, until i read all the way through the poem. And Kata it is from now on. :) Always, Tonya

My fave!!! dolls are cool like old clay fetish objects Venus De Milo etc now they are plastic loved your poem as I love visual creative stimulation I love the reference to Primal birth it has so many pointed meanings for me anyway You are such a creative writer Proprietress I always enjoy your poems Happy Orgami!!

Wow this is an amzing write I cant add anything but BRAVO !! its all been said before me and probably more eloquently... Love and Light jayC x

I am so intrigued as to where you were going with this write... after a few days of wondering, you are going to tell... right??? themoonman

The colours fire themselves onto our brains in vivid wordings, webs hanging rattled, nine dreams, shoe-laced echoes, climbing the walls purple-pain, violent, violet vales of emotion, SAPPHIRE REIGN (OOOOOO), shrivelled heads, screaming cracks, mouthing demons; it is you, Proprietress of Crimson Hearts, that have the demons flying from your lips in the form of poems that astonish our imagination into a dream-like mesmeric drama that stuns the senses and slams all elements of reality into fast heart-beating excitement. How much I enjoyed this outburst of temperament and brilliance. Wonderfully painted oh great mistress of the purple realms. It has drama, murder, humour, rhythm, downright the lot mi-Lady. Yours in humble wonder Ann of Norway

This piece deserves a careful look-see. If I were authoress here, I'd tweak a bit to add perhaps more flow ... or something. Let's see ... --- slamming raindrops break the asphalt as I cease to kiss the sun fortune’s fate has come to vanish shadows merge[, they come] to one five webs hanging in the corner rattled, stirred[, shaken] by wind nine dreams resting by the doorway flustered, roused and downward sinned --- But hey! it's a great write as is. On a personal note, my son, much later diagnosed as autistic, when very, very small thought himself a doll ... and denied he lived. (He also had cystic fibrosis, but that's another story---which killed him, by the way, at 20 years of age.) Which brings me to she’s shaking dolls up in the attic screams at chairs to climb the walls the staircase crumbles in the havoc her sanity slipping as she falls bloodstains red and bold on auction house of purple pain remains this violent vale of raw emotion billowing in her sapphire reign as if a mother tries to bring her child, her doll, to life by the shaking, while frantic/insane with grief/desperation. And it's a private, intensely personal thing for her, so she has taken it to the attic. The bloodstains to me reference the blood evidence of childbirth. (Of course another view might perceive the same as forensic evidence of loss of virginity.) Many regards, Chuck PS: You might want to fix that fiercly.

she’s shaking dolls up in the attic screams at chairs to climb the walls the staircase crumbles in the havoc her sanity slipping as she falls.... my favorite. :)