Fragments (Thank you Orgami)

Fragments

There is sadness soaked into the
Edges of linen sweet
Drops of sweat,

Memories flow;
Retreat

They sweep me now
Like currents of the sun;
Arms of great river runs

Shades of the nights
Surround and dance
Begin to fall in shadow-shows
And haunted revelry

When finished
The darkness packs up to go
Leaving stars to be devoured
By hungers pain

Let the water fall
Fill this arid void with
Lightness rain

~~~~*~~~~~

— Tonya, Apr 29, 2009

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Critiques

meic

17 years 2 months ago

You wouldn’t know this was

You wouldn't know this was an assemblage - it certainly hangs together seamlessly and stands firmly and solidly on its own two feet [so to speak]. Some of the individual passages within the piece are evocative and provoke the reader into his/her own extensions of the image or concept. I was royally entertained, and most surely stimulated, Thank you, Mike "not all matterings of mind equal one violet" ~ e e cummings ~

Tonya Greenlee

17 years 2 months ago

Mike

Thank you very much. heehee, glad you were entertained and stimulated. That is music to my eyes to read. It was a pleasure to piece together and create. I like that idea too.. letting the reader take part in seeing what they will. A lot of times, i am a more concrete type of writer, but i like these open idea ones too. Thanks again for your time to read and comment. It is much appreciated. Very glad you liked it. Always Sincere, Tonya

orgami

17 years 2 months ago

Hauntingly beautiful Tonya

an honour to be here with your dexterity of mind subtle shadings and depth and craft

Tonya Greenlee

17 years 2 months ago

:)

Thank you Orgami. You, Sir, are very sweet. I'm truly honored! Always, Tonya

Tonya Greenlee

17 years 2 months ago

Thank You Julie,

It was a pleasure. Very hard to be half as creative with those unique phrases that seem to flow effortlessly for him. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. Always Sincere, Tonya

themoonman

17 years 2 months ago

wowed!

truly inspirational poetry... I just love it here! Richard

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.

Join free Log in