The Descent into Darkness

well done nice work. It has a good flow to it, and its has some raw emotion with a comfortable end. I like the blanket of peace, good to pull over your head and shut out the world. ps welcome to neopoet regards Big Alzer.

Hey Liz, what a great beginning, I really enjoyed this, though sadly sounds like classic love gone wrong depression, what a bummer it's such a common thing in our lives, (I'm for erradicating it one way or another)... Thing is, your description is great, you've captured it really well, expressed yourself so clearly here. I look forward to more from you Liz. Cheers Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."

I thought this to be very good for your very first posting. First stanza doesn't tell me what is slipping, It leaves me wondering a bit. the forth line seems a little rough. All in all,a good poem. Keep up the good work! ______________________________________________________ Income-tax forms should be more realistic by allowing the taxpayer to list "Uncle Sam" as a dependent Anonymous

Certainly a good start. Your poem makes good sense and has a consistent rhythm appropriate for the subject of the piece. Mike "not all matterings of mind equal one violet" ~ e e cummings ~