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The gate to the moon

 

The night is still, darkness reigns

Enveloping all things human in sweet slumber

The earth spins dreamily on its slow axis

As shy night creatures roam its surface

 

But hark! There is one human being left

One insomniac poetess who cannot sleep

She wades through a sea of words

Heading for her secret moongate

 

With quiet but firm steps

She traverses the fragile reality

And enters her magic universe

Where celestial beings wait for her

 

She hangs with the likes of Jupiter and Venus

And occasionally stoops to pick a star

She bathes in the light of the moon

To soothe the yearning of her soul

 

Stepping through the gate again

Her feet touch ground, she returns to Earth

Where she sets about creating paper wings

Embroidering them with the stars she picked

 

As the sun's fingers tenderly stroke the blushing horizon

The poetess yawns and stows her stationery away

She slips into her everywoman´s guise again

And sets about prosaic things like housework

 

But her soul is enlightened by her muse, the moon

And sometimes, when she does the washing

She will find a tiny sparkling star she overlooked

Still clinging to the folds of her night gown

 


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O

orgami

17 years 1 month ago

what this is Rhonda,s words>

A beautiful poem I love the last line "and sets about prosaic things like housework." and if Rhonda inspired this well Hurray to Rhonda too but thats whats great about Neo we inspire each other!! Five stars!!
I

Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

Orgami,

thank you for your read and the comment! Seems we´re having a time of mutual inspiration and appreciation here at the moment. Ronda has been (and still is) a great friend, and an even greater inspiration to me. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
themoonman

themoonman

17 years 1 month ago

Nina...

magical... engaging for the reader(me)! and I too love the way you ended your moon soaked magic... Richard
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Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

Thanks, Richard,

when I first met Ronda, she was "moongate" to me, and she has often told me how much she loves the moon. So, the moon and she will always be connected in my mind. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 1 month ago

Nina, Nina,

This flowed like a quiet river under a full silvery moon! The unreality of creation, being brought back to the world of toil, and put down on paper for all to enjoy! I love how you fly on your wings, and bring back the star dust, sprinkling it all over the world! I truly enjoyed how you show the escape of a writer. GREAT JOB!!! thanks, Eddie Life is like a railroad track that leads to many junctures, if you stand on the track Love comes speeding along and runs you over!! Splat!!!!
I

Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

Eddie!

You´re back! Thank you for your awesome comment. Will have to check out your latest work soon! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
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Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

hey Ben,

maybe it gets better if one knows Ronda´s work... There are many allusions to her and her work in this piece. Maybe you would care to reread it later? It might still grip you. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

Proprietress o…

17 years 1 month ago

in sweet slumber...

Nina, this piece is incredibly lovely, so poetic and somehow silky, yes like dark silk on pale skin...a beautiful piece and a wonderful tribute. oh an dhow we can all relate to this "insomniac poetess", right? I especially love the first two lines of this piece. but the last line: "But her soul is enlightened by her muse, the moon." seems very doppelt-gemoppelt, you know? I feel it disrupts the flow, I really stumbled on that one. maybe, if I may suggest this, you could change it? or leave it out alltogether? the rest is absolutely awesome!!! your Proprietress
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Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

Oh, Kata,

I do not wish to have my piece end with "prosaic things like housework". Maybe the problem is the single line? Do you think I should write another stanza around it? Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
I

Ink Dragon

17 years 1 month ago

How about now, Kata?

I´ve added a few lines to the last one. Are the changes for better or for worse? Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

Proprietress o…

17 years ago

perfect,

now it is more than worthy of 5 stars. now I just need to figure out how to give them to you...
A

Arrow

17 years ago

I looked at your first draft.

This ending is significantly better. Perfect. This strikes me less as a poem than a fairy-tale/character snapshot but there are no problems as a poem. The only issue for me is this line: "She hangs with the likes of Jupiter and Venus." I've only head "with the likes of" used in a negative context, like "she hangs with the likes of pimps and drug dealers." This is a cultural issue, I'm sure. Enchanting poem.
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Arrow,

thanks. Glad to hear I´ve changed it for good. The line you refer to is from one of Ronda´s poems, I just "stole" it, so you would better discuss the implications of "the likes of" with her. But I would answer (if it was my line) that the old gods were little better than the average human being, guilty of all-too-human feelings like jealousy, pride and greed on the one hand and on the other, they represent a mystical, magic age most poets yearn for. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Kailashana

Kailashana

17 years ago

Oh, my….!truth be told,

Oh, my....! truth be told, it's the little star in our nightgown that is the belle of the ball. ;-) ~A "We have to try to get rid of the notion of time. And when you have an intense contact of love with nature or another human being, like a spark, then you understand that there is no time and that everything is eternal." Paulo Coelho
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Anna,

you found my little eye catcher that I added as an afterthought! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Arrow,

I´m not completely sure, but I think it was "Celestial", don´t know if she has posted it here. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
C

Craig Norris

17 years ago

dreamy quality

Hi Nina, that dreamy quality threw me at first, I thought the poem lacked a certain tightness, but I am learning to look beyond and am glad I took this ride. I like the idea of us bringing momentos from our otherworldly journeys. Craig
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Craig,

thank you for your comment. As I said a few comments above, this poem may mean more to people who know Ronda and her work. Glad you liked it even though you have not met my friend and muse Ronda yet. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years ago

Nina,

Holy Cow!! It's impossible to make something that is great better, but you've pulled it off with this new final stanza! "But her soul is enlightened by her muse, the moon And sometimes, when she does the washing, She will find a tiny sparkling star she overlooked Still clinging to the folds of her night gown." The dream has followed her home to the world of reality!! Justification that she is not MAD AS A HATTER!!! Awesome!! thanks, Eddie Life is like a railroad track that leads to many junctures, if you stand on the track Love comes speeding along and runs you over!! Splat!!!!
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Eddie,

laughing out loud at your comment, especially the "not mad as a hatter" part! And glad to hear that you like the changes! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years ago

Nina,

I had given you five on this one when I read it before the change, now the stars have flown away, maybe I'm the one that's "mad as a hatter" Well I gave them! So here they are *******************************************!! Eddie Life is like a railroad track that leads to many junctures, if you stand on the track Love comes speeding along and runs you over!! Splat!!!!
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Eddie,

your stars are still there, no worries! I think you can only give them again if you haven´t already given five stars. But thanks for your new rating, even if it seems slightly over the moon. How many stars are that? Yours, ~Nina
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years ago

Nina,

It is the amount of star this deserves with the new ending that made it even better!! thanks, Eddie Life is like a railroad track that leads to many junctures, if you stand on the track Love comes speeding along and runs you over!! Splat!!!!
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Thumbs up for Kata!

I had already set about writing you a comment saying that you need to click the underlined subject line of your comment to do so, but you have obviously figured that out all by yourself! Yours, ~Nina Attention everyone: Change of rating system! http://www.neopoet.com/forum/20740
faerybeki

faerybeki

17 years ago

Nina, awesome poem, love the

Nina, awesome poem, love the juxtoposition of the ordinary and extraordinary :) Great write and another wonderful dedication. (I'm not familiar with Ronda, but am intrigued to read her, is 'Ronda' her neoname?) much love b xx
I

Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Thanks, Beki,

for the read and the comment! The ordinary and the extraordinary, isn´t that what we are all made of? If you would like to look up Ronda´s work, you will have to look for RSScheerer here on Neopoet. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Pixee

Pixee

17 years ago

Good Morining to you

Hi, ink Dragon. I just got done reading your poem. I had read xDARKxPURPLEx. She is one of many favorite poets on this site. I had asked her if she was interested in being in my book I'm publishing of all my I have written. I asked if she would like to make some extra money. I would put her name on all her poems she would want in my book. I have an publisher already, and I was just wondering if you would like to make some extra money through pay pal or I could send you your portion of your poems with your name for your credit. I could send you a postal money order if you are interested or go thru pay pal. If you would rather not, no hard feelings. I would love to see your poems in print so the whole world can see your great work. I am a woman of my word and I will send you your portion of the money for sure. I have a conscience that would not let me cheat you. And I wouldn't any way. You have been to good to me in reading and criticing my poems. Please let me know, if yes please gather up the poems you would like to be published and send them to me. Thank you for your time. Take care of YOU!! Your Friend, Pixee
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Pixee,

thank you for thinking my poems should be published. In fact, I have sent several of them to publishers, and am still waiting for some of them to respond. So far, two replies have been positive and one negative, so there will be some items for my Neo bookshelf soon. As I understand it, publishers do not wish to receive material that has already been accepted by other publishers or is still being reviewed by other publishers, so I do not think my poems would be of any use to you. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

This drew me in ! so

This drew me in ! so beautifully wrtien it was so smooth like glass ... I read a few of the earlier comments and well im sorry but i disagree LOL my perogative ... I love how you wrote the last stanza and well im a mum and housewife i find those those tiny sparkling stars as you call them :) five from me Love and light JayC
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

JayC,

thanks for your lovely comment! And may you find many more sparkling stars! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Linda Moses

Linda Moses

17 years ago

What a lovely

piece this is. wouldn't it be wonderful if we could enter a moon gate. I often come up with lines for a new poem as I am trying to sleep, and if I don't get up and write them down right then, by morning, they are gone. Linda
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Linda,

thank you so much for your sweet comment. I loved the moon babies and thought it so funny that we have both written a poem with the moon in it. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Pixee

Pixee

17 years ago

Great!!

I loved it, it deserves every star you can get and more. Keep up the great writings. You are such an inspiration to me. Take care of YOU!! Your Friend, Pixee
RSScheerer

RSScheerer

17 years ago

Nina, my lovely friend

I finally made it here, only to be completely enthralled by this piece. Not only am I honored to be considered an inspiration, the ethereal beauty and intrigue of your words humble me. Gorgeous work, as always. Thank you so much, both for writing and sharing! Much love ~ Ronda, aka moongate P.S. I got a chuckle at your explanation regarding "the likes of" - it was dead on!
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Ronda,

you deserve the best, and I am glad that you consider my poem to be good enough. Love, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

17 years ago

Moongate maiden

You have charmed us out to the dark night skies and let us dance with Jupiter and Venus, and told us a little tale we loved to follow, a good poem here. The only thing that jarred just a little for me, was the "with the likes" it seems more prosaic in this context. Yours Ann of Norway
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Ann,

thank you for your lovely comment. For the explanation of "the likes", please see my previous comments. I cannot take it out, because it is one of Ronda´s lines that will be stuck in my head forever. Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
Rett

Rett

17 years ago

Hanging with the likes of you and Ronda

Can only make a person better. We southerners use that term all the time along with "fixin' to". as in, I'm fixin' to go to the store, you want anything? *G* Now as for the poem. I thought is was very very good from start to finish. I like the start, I loved the finish and everything in between in "the body" that you didn't lose. *G* Well done. 5/5 from me. Respectfully, Rett: "A Democracy can withstand anything but Democrats." Robert A. Heinlein For the sake of children, read this. http://www.neopoet.com/node/19905
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Rett,

I´ve taken a look and patted myself a little: My body is here. Or did you mean the body of my poem? ;) And thanks for saying that hanging with the likes of me and Ronda is a good thing! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Kelsey,

and I am always glad that you like what I wrote! Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
theladyblue

theladyblue

17 years ago

oh how fitting!

and as an insomniac & lover of the moon myself i can tell you that this touched me...brought tears to the surface! Nina my friend, it has been a while since i have visited your work and for that i am now made truly sorry! stunning write! <3 Emarie "i read you and see…that between the pen, paper and you…there is little room for me…" ~ heartbreaker~Go Live & Get Rewarded!!! Check us out at http://www.neopoet.com/forum/20761 & the Community Calender!!!
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Thanks Emarie,

but no need to be sorry, I cannot always find the time to read and comment on your poems either, even though I usually love them. You never fail to surprise me and draw me into your "secret universe". Yours, ~Nina “Like plumbers and dentists, poets are fallible, and the possibility of genuine nonsense cannot be ruled out.” (Mark Haddon)
M

margo

17 years ago

I like poetry that describes

I like poetry that describes something that is never linked to our earthly existance, the secret lives of our eath mothers/women... and when you discover the secrets makes them dear to you beyond measure, the glint of a night star in a nightgown, makes you take time to consider the ordinary woman sitting opposite you!  Thankyou for this it will sustain me.
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Ink Dragon

17 years ago

Hello, margo,

you're welcome, and I feel honoured that my poem managed to encourage you. Yours, ~Nina
M

Monalisa

16 years 1 month ago

I want to bring this back...

I could wallow in this poem all day and take comfort from it. It came up on a search I did using the word Moon. My favorite lines: She hangs with the likes of Jupiter and Venus And occasionally stoops to pick a star and: Where she sets about creating paper wings Embroidering them with the stars she picked and: As the sun’s fingers tenderly stroke the blushing horizon and this especially: And sometimes, when she does the washing She will find a tiny sparkling star she overlooked Still clinging to the folds of her night gown Thanks, Mona
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Ink Dragon

16 years 1 month ago

Thank you, Mona,

this is a poem to a special person whose skillful poetry and thoughtful comments are missed by many here. I am glad you enjoyed it. Yours, ~Nina