A ship made with your sails

We all sail though time
In seas made up in our minds
Do you see blues or greens?
Is the water not only true but also clean
Do you see the sun setting at the end?
Do you love yourself more as a friend?
Do you think the seas are too hard to climb?
Will you trust yourself with love as a sign?
Will you follow the voice in your soul?
As the journey is long and the days grow old
Therefore, can you step up to the plate?
Therefore, can you just sail though all your bad mistakes
You have to fight with all your heart
Use your mistakes for they are a part
Follow your heart into the too sun
Let your mistakes be over and done

Pressley Hambrick

— press, Feb 13, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

themoonman

17 years 3 months ago

Pressley...

Welcome to Neopoet... I hope you enjoy yourself here as much as I do... I noticed you dropped several poems in the forum... I would ask you to consider the other poets here for that is the reason for the allowance of one poem within the stream... and if you truly want your poems read by us with an honest look, then you should adhere to the rules of one per day... with that being said, some folks post from Library's and post more than one in the forum area, so if that is your reason for doing so, then I do apologize for assuming otherwise. your poem, I liked it... it had several good lines in it, one in particular I thought was great... Do you love yourself more as a friend... In my opinion you were going for a certain flow, beat if you will... and some of the lines could have been altered slightly to accommodate... Therefore was used twice, I feel the second one could have been left completely out for repetition's sake and the line would be smoother... I thought your title was good, it was interesting and went along well with the theme... these opinions are mine and there may be some who disagree, and you may disagree and that is fine... welcome again... if I have time I'll read a couple more of the forum poems you submitted... Richard

press

17 years 3 months ago

Hi Richard let me say I am

Hi Richard let me say I am honored that you read my work truly Finally I can talk to someone about my need to write Richard I am consumed with writing poetry I guess it shows by the way I over loaded the site . I can write two to three poems a day its like a madness I have to write. And don't get me wrong I am not un happy with my life [ NO CRAZY GIRLFRIENDS OR WIFE I HAVE ONE BEAUTIFUL WHO IS ON HIS WAY AND I OWN MY OWN BUSINESS] I truly want to get better So this is my honer to you You are the first person to me As we all are busy you toke the time to read This is the honer that I see And this unbiased interest was given as a key See what I mean Thank you Richard

themoonman

17 years 3 months ago

Well then...

it is me honored... glad to have you on the site. You will find you are surrounded by people here with the same need to write... so we not only understand, but share your desire... Have fun... Richard