Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

themoonman

Feb 05, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

The Forum

He's standing at the forum,
I need to listen well...
read between his almost truths
and the ones I tell myself...

but my garnet eyes
give my thoughts away.
He is standing there crying
...this is my worst day.

Regretting all the reasons
I've aspired to obtain...
the documents I'm holding,
life will never be the same.

I'm free, and I have custody,
but I don't feel like I've won...
the last thing I ever wanted
was to keep him from his mom...

and he's pointing every finger,
blames me for the loss he feels...
says he's missed his mother,
another dream I've killed.

He refuses to hear the truth,
he's past the listening part...
he thinks that mine is the worst...
the coldest kind of heart.

All he sees is mom
not the police or the bong...
one day I hope he sees,
how this was killing me...

but for now,
he's standing at the forum.

— themoonman, Feb 05, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

More from this author

Critiques

17 years 4 months ago

The Forum

Chills were running down my spine as I read this one Moon. You touched me with this write~ ______________________________________________________ Income-tax forms should be more realistic by allowing the taxpayer to list "Uncle Sam" as a dependent Anonymous

17 years 4 months ago

Janice...

Chills are such a great review... thank you Richard

17 years 4 months ago

Chills Here Too

This is VERY moving, and powerfully relevant...

17 years 4 months ago

Hi Rob...

Thank you so much for reading and commenting... your words make me feel you carried my thoughts away with you... thank you! Richard

O

orgami

17 years 4 months ago

oh Moonman

you fought for your children I could not I let her slide away and now she returns this Friday or Saturday what am I to do who is she and who am I oh my Love your poems my good freind deep and introspective dont feel good lately hope you understand losing contact touch the light distant

17 years 4 months ago

Orgami...

This is indeed a true write for me... but I have been married three times, two kids from my first marriage. I was the weekend dad for years... they are both grown now. This write was a shortened version of my second marriage, my son from that one is now seventeen, when we split up he was two... and she had a lot of problems... I had to fight for him... I could go into the details but I would almost need to write a book my friend, so don't feel to bad about being the weekend dad... nobody is perfect, and as long as her mom treats her well and you do too, then she has the chance to become a thriving somewhat normal being... and that is enough in the end. Love is what our kids need, along with the normal everyday things, like food and clothing and dentist appointments... Sorry you haven't been feeling good, and I do understand the distant light... only too well. thanks Richard

17 years 4 months ago

Like the lilt

I was really carried along in the rhythm of this poem and its lilt is almost happy although its content disturbingly sad, I empathise but have no answer to the problem except to be yourself, he can take it or leave it. I am glad then, that I have no children of my own. Ann of Norway.

17 years 4 months ago

Ann...

thank you for your heart-felt comment. I thank you for the good advice too... being true to ones self is usually the only way to go... Richard

17 years 4 months ago

I too, got custody of my son

when the first marriage broke up. It wasn't until he was grown he quit blaming me. He spent time with his mom and her drinking. She got drunk and told him about taking him to the beer joints as a baby and leaving him asleep in the car while she partied, leaving him at home by himself, all the good stuff. Sometimes it just takes awhile. You can't tell them as it doesn't do any good. They won't believe you. Great write Richard! Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water." If government is the answer, it's a stupid question!

17 years 4 months ago

Rett...

I see you totally understand the situation, thank you. My ex had the need to be high, didn't really matter what it was. Drinking or drugs would suffice for her, but she started smoking crack and became someone else... she no longer cared about anything or anyone... thanks Richard

P

poewriter58

17 years 4 months ago

Richard

This is a very sad write. Children never understand until they are grown. Nice meter in this poem Chrys

17 years 4 months ago

Hi Chrys...

thank you! Richard

17 years 4 months ago

The Forum

Richard My heart cries for you my friend the struggle of giving life and being part of thier lives. You may have only been a weekend dad but you were there and saw your child grow. painful as this is, Children do not see the whole picture until they are grown even though you try to explain they will never ever really know the pain you suffered too. It is all about them. They are so luck to have had a weekend dad. I would love to have had a weekend mom or dad instead of being in an orphanage with no one but me for me. They should be so gratefull you were there for them. They will come around one day and hopefully they will thank you show you their love and see both sides of mom and dad. It is a rocky road my friend there will be lots of trial and tribulations. But you have to stay strong for them. One day not too far off they will understand and be there for you too. love and hugs always electricblue

17 years 4 months ago

electricblue...

thank you for reading and leaving your warming thoughts... it is much appreciated... Richard

17 years 4 months ago

Janice...

thank you for your kind words on this write of mine.... your time and consideration is very much appreciated! Richard

17 years 4 months ago

Dearest Moonman,For most of

Dearest Moonman, For most of her teen years, I was going through difficult times with my daughter, after years of absolutely no communication with her father, she decided to live with him when he came back into her life. It hurt like hell. Less than a month later she came home. He never re=entered her life and she now calls him her *sperm donor*. It's sad that he missed out on the tough times and the brilliant times, a grandson and the gem of a woman she is now. At one time, more than one of my beloved friends said, (when I was in totally despair), "your daughter will be much like you, she can't help but be".... And so I give you their words, Moonman. Just hang in there with your broken heart and break our hearts with your poems. Much love, Anna "We have to try to get rid of the notion of time. And when you have an intense contact of love with nature or another human being, like a spark, then you understand that there is no time and that everything is eternal." Paulo Coelho

17 years 4 months ago

Anna...

Thank you for sharing your battles with your daughter with me... your comforting nature is sent out over the net with every word you say... and my son is finally beginning to see... thank you! Richard

Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

Proprietress o…

17 years 4 months ago

Mr. Moonman,

you have made this Proprietress all sad-faced with this touching poem... I feel this to be one of your most emotional writes yet. respectfully, Kata

17 years 4 months ago

Kata...

I'm glad it moved you but I don't want you sad... Now I have to post something funny...hmmmmm well, there is my picture... lol.. thank you my proprietress of poetic propensities... Richard

17 years 4 months ago

Themoonman

i am using the word touching again, for lack of something more appropriate. keep on writing.

17 years 4 months ago

Nokros...

I thank you for being touched by my attempt to "get it out". Writing for me is old-medicine I am addicted to... I find myself wandering off in the middle of conversations... placing words on the pages inside... thanks for reading and commenting! Richard

R

R.M.Shanmugam

17 years 3 months ago

a profound write of

a profound write of feelings. rhytnmically written. shan

17 years 3 months ago

Shan...

thank you sir... your opinion humbles me! Richard

T

Taurus1970

17 years 3 months ago

Hi, Richard! You’ve

Hi, Richard! You've managed to succintly and poetically capture the harsh conflicting emotions and issues that arise in a situation like this. What you said is so true, about being free and having custody, but still you have not won...this was a deep one... "If I had a prayer, it would be this: God, spare me from the desire for love, approval, or appreciation..." - Byron Katie

17 years 3 months ago

Taurus...

glad to see you on the board... thank you for the great comments, I am thrilled you were able to relate but at the same time, saddened. thank you! Richard

17 years 3 months ago

Hi Richard

Once again you have written something close to my heart, and with great skill. My two boys grew up with their dad, something we chose because he had greater stability. He was a Master's degree psychologist and I was a vagabond, still am. However, it's always the kids who really lose. They have always struggled. In our case, no right or wrong, just wrong. My daughter, on the other hand, who grew up with two parents from beginning to end is a winner. Too bad we don't know this stuff in the beginning--doesn't seem quite fair. Loved your poem. Yours, D.

17 years 3 months ago

Deelilah...

The children always lose in the battles between people that cannot stay together... but sometimes it is worse to try and live together for the children, and end up hating each other with intensity felt by the kids, I've seen this over and over. What is the right decisions, we can only make them for ourselves. Thank you for sharing with me for your generous nature says much... thanks Richard

17 years 3 months ago

Julie...

I thank you for your heart-pouring story... I do wish you all the strength you will need for the circumstances... My son has finally seen his Mom for who she is. Although she loves him, she was never a parent. As soon as she had him she started going out and smoking crack. She had the habit for years. She ended up leaving me and him at around his first birthday and then she ended up in prison. For a long time when she got out, she kept him on weekends until the police were there one night and social services came in. They decided she shouldn't see him at all... and I have had soul custody since... but I never could not let him see his mom. I have always let her come over here and see him, I just never would let him ride off with her. I do think she has finally quit smoking crack, but she still isn't a parent in any sense of the word. Myself, I smoke too, but not crack... and I am no angel, but I had to fly fairly straight for him... and so I do. Good luck on the up-coming trial, I feel for you as your situation is much more complicated... three kids and from your own family... those kids are so lucky to have you in their lives. The good thing about most child custody cases like this is usually the court won't change something that is working...as in my case, he was fed and taken care of, going to school and doctor's appts. All that counts in your favor. Please let me know how it comes out... Richard

J

17 years 3 months ago

A good write on this one.

True life captures any reader,no matter what the reason is for reading.This one was well spoken.I sense the loss and sadness in it,and some poems wont do that,when it is called for.It reminds me that i have work to do in wording the works that i submit.Thanks for reading my works,and i hope you continue to. Your friend in peace, Scott.

17 years 3 months ago

Hi Scott...

Thank you for reading and commenting, glad you liked it... thanks Richard

J

JoJo

17 years 2 months ago

Powerful message

Wow! A very good write and so true as many can attest. It's been my experience (counseling)that no matter how much a child/adult child loves their father, the chain is broken when their mother is no longer around. That link is connected with mother from the day of conception. This has a way of making them feel abandon and yes they have to blame someone. It's no reflection on dad (of course it feels that way.) But, as they mature in their emotions they are able to admit what they've known all along and that is their father loves them. Sometimes it takes longer for some than others to mature emotionally. Afterall we are their role models and that says it all. But be assured they know the truth in their hearts.

17 years 2 months ago

JoJo...

My old slack self finally caught up with this comment... thank you for seeing into the write and for the encouraging words... Richard

B

blistered-pen

17 years 2 months ago

divorce is something else...

my parents are divorced. well, actually maybe not. my dad wouldn't sign the papers & i haven't seen him in about seven years. i never had to watch my parents battle it out in court or be surrounded by strangers that say all they want is what's best for me. what do they know? right? i never hated my mom for taking us away. i hated my dad though, for leaving, for making things so much harder than i thought they should've been. we were better off but even if he were more horrible than he was.. i'd still miss him. it was weird & still is weird going through my teen years without that protective dad, scaring boys away and swearing to kill anyone that hurt me. it's hard with one parent and no matter how much someone else makes your mom or dad so much more happier, it's hard to accept them as family. sometimes we don't realise how much better off we are. but then, sometimes people don't realise hiw much we'd rather have the complete set of parents.. no matter how hard or fucked up it'd be. your poem really got me thinking. i still think about my dad. just a few nights ago, i couldn't sleep. thinking about him. i have no idea where he is. what he's doing. if he's healthy.. hopefully the boy does know where his mother is how she's doing if she's healthy.. your poem is beautiful in that "oh my god that's so sad" way. sory for talking more about me than about your poem. just had to spill i guess. :) kudos Richard, for ...

17 years 2 months ago

Blistered Pen...

just wanted you to know that your spillage was read, and appreciated... you know you are one of my favorite poets here and anytime you want to "spill" is fine with me... My son is now seventeen, he talks to his Mom almost daily on the phone... Have you seen the t.v. show "the Locater"... someone could find your Dad if you wanted to... just an idea! thanks Richard