Rett

Feb 02, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Crescent Moon

Crescent Moon

Her hair is palest silver
skin of finest cream
eyes are sparkling diamonds
lips a ruby dream

She moves like a cat
timeless fluid grace
an ethereal beauty
across time and space

A soft purring voice
almost a soothing croon
taking you on a voyage
to the dark side of the moon

Upon her breast a crescent
anchored by a silver chain
the mystery of the lady
whose beauty is pleasure-pain

Movements a boneless motion
never makes a sound
she appears as if from nowhere
as you turn around

Now if you should search for her
listen for her mystic tune
as the strings are plucked gently
in the shadows of the crescent moon

— Rett, Feb 02, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Southern Texas, USA

Favorite Poets: Dickenson, Longfellow

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Critiques

W.C.Wampler

17 years 4 months ago

Crescent Moon Poem

Rett, As I say, you are a creftsman, but I see you put a question mark after last word 'moon'. I think you want to change this, but to what? I thought for a minute, and please don't be offended, but perhaps a change along this line..... Now if you would search for her, listen for her mystic tune. And look for her, like the rest of the orb, in the shadow on the crescent moon. You are an expert writer, but then, the question mark, like a challenge..............wcw

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Bingo WCW!

You are very close to what I am looking for and you picked up the challenge. I wrote it and was not happy with the last stanza so thought I would post it as a challenge. I love your line 2 and 4 and will most likely incorporate them as they are downright awesome. Let me give it a day or two and see what, if any, others come up with. You are quick sir, very quick to pick up on it! Thank you! I am NEVER offended by constructive critique. The whole point of posting here is to improve and anything anyone can tell me/show me how to improve something I appreciate! Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

W.C.Wampler

17 years 4 months ago

Crescent Moon comment reply

Rett.,Thank you for the return compliment. I don't like to critisize a respected poets' final copy. I take it or leave it. But You are Rett, and the (?) would not be a mistake. It felt like a challenge. Nicely done. wcw

Cloudthings

17 years 4 months ago

Bet 1/2 of what we do ends up at the end of someone's pen round

This was a lovely poem I think... & I am new here, not used to critiqueing (though I spent some time Lecturing at Uni... I prefer the encouraging perspectives, so don't expect a hard line), I will tell you when something pleases me, & this did... & how lovely to read of your long lasting love & commitment, it gives me heart dear Rett, truly it is too rare, & caries hope in such a transient world of love & lust... I might have to write about it even!!! Hah, it's a dangerous place to keep company this, so much will end up at the end of someone's pen I reckon... & how I LOVE that idea. Look forward to reading more from you. Anni

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you Anni

So many here provide fodder for new poems from the words and comments that are read and posted. If a person stops to listen, to read, to dream, smell, taste or touch, it can be written about. Whether it be about a knot in a shoelace or an epiphany of the highest order, it is fuel for a poem. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you Kelsey

I hope to always keep amazing you and not be boring. *L* Working on that last stanza. Seeing if I can incorporate the suggestions and keep a good flow to it. I appreciate it! Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you very much Janice

I keep trying. *S* I hope I don't run dry. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

Wafi

17 years 4 months ago

Crescent Moon

Enjoyed the beauty of your poem, Rett.I get inspiration from your poems. Sincerely, Wafi

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you very much Wafi

Glad they inspire someone. *S* My deepest appreciation! Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

poewriter58

17 years 4 months ago

Rett

This was awesome , one of your best . But then I'm still waiting for something to correct lol. Chrys

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you Chrys

I always appreciate it my friend. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

Linda Moses

17 years 4 months ago

Rett

yet another beauty. I was hoping for something more, and I don't know what, before the last stanza

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thanks Linda

Hmmm, not sure what more I could add, but will think on it. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

orgami

17 years 4 months ago

Wow Rhett

sepia memories the wind in the birch the loon on the dark green lake the fire sparkling its embers climbing tall vesper you improve greatly sir

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you Orgami

I feel honored at your comments. I am working on a short story to add in with my Shattered Crystal poems when I have the time. Tentative title is "Shattered Crystal - The Shield and the Sword. Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."

deelilah

17 years 4 months ago

Dear Rett

I love moon poems. There is so much metaphor available for them. And there's so much mystery, like this: 'A soft purring voice almost a soothing croon taking you on a voyage to the dark side of the moon' I loved it. Yours, Dee

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

Thank you Deelilah

Yep, moon poems can have so much mystery involved and so many metaphors. I guess you could say I am a bit of a Luna-tic. *G* Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water." If government is the answer, it's a stupid question!