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shazbat
shazbat
Jan 11, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Natural disaster

You’re a bastard she said

As she jumped out of bed

How could you do that and smile

How can you lay there and laugh like that

When the smell is so pungent and vile
 

Oh, don’t be so silly

Get in here, its chilly

Get in, I won’t do it again

Oh! don’t be a creep, how on earth can I sleep

With someone who smells like a drain

— shazbat, Jan 11, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Norfolk, UK, GBR

Favorite Poets: Kipling, T.S Eliot, Hilaire Belloc, Ogden Nash, Spike Milligan and many more.

More from this author

Critiques

L

Lonnie

17 years 4 months ago

Thanks for another Gem, Shazbat!

This one had me laughing so hard I was gasping for air! (Probably much like the lady in your poem!) Keep 'em coming my friend!
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 4 months ago

LOL, John!

That's nasty ass right there! And yes, anyone who does a 'dutch oven' is just sick and wrong.... LOL! ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- - "You can choose from phanthom fears, and kindness that can kill. I will choose a path that's clear; I will choose free will..." - Rush
Rett

Rett

17 years 4 months ago

What a Gas!

Got a good laugh out of this stinker! Tell her to count her blessing, her head wasn't under the covers was it? Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water."
shazbat

shazbat

17 years 4 months ago

Good to know you got a laugh

Good to know you got a laugh out of this, personally I wouldnt dare do a thing like that, I think my wife would kill me, either that or I'd be in the spare room. Regards John
Race_9togo

Race_9togo

17 years 4 months ago

LOL....Nobody

does it like Shazbat LOL As excellent as ever. Shaz if I bust a gut from laughing too hard, I'm sending you the bill! Marvelous stuff Respectfully, Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race
shazbat

shazbat

17 years 4 months ago

Race, I’m not sure that my

Race, I'm not sure that my insurance would pay the medical bills so try not to laugh too much wont you, glad it made you raise a titter tho. John
P

poewriter58

17 years 4 months ago

John

You never cease to amaze me with your writing. Another laugh a minute poem Good Stuff Chrys
shazbat

shazbat

17 years 4 months ago

Thanks Chrys glad you liked

Thanks Chrys glad you liked it. I wrote some Limericks tonight, will be posting them on here in about an hour or so, there may be one or two of them that will raise a smile. Regards John
shazbat

shazbat

17 years 4 months ago

This wasn’t me, honestly!

This wasn't me, honestly! because I'm perfect, well my wife always says "you're Mr perfect aren't you, you never do anything wrong" and she is always right. Thanks for reading. Regards John
Kailashana

Kailashana

17 years 4 months ago

Shaking my head out

Shaking my head out loud....how DO you do that? I'm talking about writing the poems, John! I sure hope your wife has a sense of humour, (she has to, she has all the stinky parts!) Wink. ~A "All in all, it's just another brick in the wall." Pink Floyd There are no walls except for the ones we build. ~me~
shazbat

shazbat

17 years 4 months ago

I know that flatulence is

I know that flatulence is cropping up far too much, but we have a Boxer dog and anyone who's ever had one will tell you that they are prone to being a bit windy, so in our house it is quite a common topic of conversation. I sat down and wrote a few limericks this evening and will be posting them in a few minutes, needless to say there is one that involves farting. Regards John