Barbara Writes

Jan 07, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Love Silence My Thunder

In the center of my chest
My heart burns for no reason
But your love for me
Made it flee

Common grounds once handy
Have turned badly
But you love for me
Gave me peace

Sleepless nights of hunger
Have gotten longer
But your tender affection
Gave me satisfaction

In your arms where it’s warm
I take refuge from the storm
With your love flowing deep
I finally fall asleep

As thunder in my life
Rages on in the night
In your loving arms
My thunder meets the calm

— Barbara Writes, Jan 07, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Billy Collins, Shakespeare, , Emily Dickinson, , , Whitman, Jess Tapper

Critiques

Ink Dragon

17 years 5 months ago

Barbara

this reads really good. Have you been converted to rhyming? Or did that just happen? Greetings, ~Nina P.S. l.2 heartburns/heart burns?

Barbara Writes

17 years 5 months ago

Nina

Appreciate your comment. I am bored with letting it flow as it comes so I am forcing myself to rhyme and it getting easier because I haven't been using my rhyme dictionary like I normally do. I wrote one a few minutes ago that is not rhyme. Are their any area I need to work on with rhyming. I think My last three are rhymes. Right now I am just writing non stop being conscience of my rhymes. Thanks for the suggestion on the heartburns. I was not sure which to use because my word doc changes it Respectfully Yours, Barbara

Race_9togo

17 years 5 months ago

Beautiful

This poem is wonderful. In the fourth verse, I think "arm" should be plural, but I simply love the way you've captured the feeling of safety and trust in your lover's arms, without saying it explicitly. Respectfully, Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race

Barbara Writes

17 years 5 months ago

Jim

I appreciate you comments. I miss that little(s), thanks for letting me know. I have made the correction. This is one of several I have written today they are flowing one after another. Thanks I am glad you like. Every little feeling is making me write. Respectfully Yours, Barbara

easylife_2

17 years 5 months ago

THis is good Barbara

Really enjoyed reading it,would have hade some comments but you said you are experimenting with rhyming which is alright.Thanks.

Barbara Writes

17 years 5 months ago

Easy

Some suggestion would be nice. I'm looking to understand the flow and meter of rhyming. Sometimes I may not understand what's being said so be patient with me. I really want to learn. What comments do you have? Respectfully Yours, Barbara

Proprietress o…

17 years 4 months ago

Barbara,

you know, I find your poetry is getting deeper and... well... more poetic. you have been surprising me with every new post. a few suggestions about the rhyming: would you consider changing to but your love for me has made it flee I feel that it flows a bit better. the rhyming in the second and third stanza is not as obvious as in the others. but I don't know how to change the words without losing the meaning, which is, after all, the most important thing. I love the last two lines... my thunder meets the calm... so much beauty in such a small amount of words... your Proprietress

Barbara Writes

17 years 4 months ago

Proprietress

thanks i am happy you are so interested i this poem. i agree your love for me flow better. has made it flee does flow better also, i would prefer to keep it made it flee. short and sweet. i sincerely appreciate you suggestion much and hope to learn more and more about rhyming and meter. ~~~~~~~~~ Be whoever you are At all times, and Remember that Because of this, people will Always Respect, and Admire you ©2008Leonard Respectfully Yours, Barbara

Race_9togo

17 years 4 months ago

Barbara

I keep coming back to this, it getting stuck in my head! it just keeps getting smoother. the "s" still aint there though! Heehee Respectfully, Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race

Barbara Writes

17 years 4 months ago

Jim

Thanks for coming back and reminding me. some how i miss that little bugger. thought i had him. Glad you are coming back and enjoying. ~~~~~~~~~ Be whoever you are At all times, and Remember that Because of this, people will Always Respect, and Admire you ©2008Leonard Respectfully Yours, Barbara