word salad

There was a suspicion this piece involved mental illness before I even read your comment. That proves either you have captured the breakdown with your talent for words, or I'm far too close to mental illnesses ... maybe both? ;) You've done a very good job with this piece. It spirals into confusion, just as it should. I wonder if your reader would know why without your explanation, though? Perhaps it is better to leave it to the imagination. Best ~ Ronda

chosen, well placed. This piece reminds me of the too common dementia of oldsters, something that can too often be cleared up by ingesting B-12 (by mouth or injection) ... or by dealing at least partly successfully with deep depression ... or by clearing up infection(s) ... or by hydrating ... and probably via a number of other routes/treatments. I know these so-called remedies don't work with schizophrenics. But then to be schizophrenic is not 180 degrees different from being just plain demented. Ergo, my being reminded. So far---cross my fingers/knock on wood---I've not been accused of having dementia or being schizophrenic. As a result, I have to employ/work on other means of getting attention. Altho it backfires when the resulting attention's of a nature unwanted. I admire your obvious fit into another's shoes. It's not usual for a poet to write authentically about experience(s) of life not his/her own. I think, though, you've succeeded here quite well. My hat's off. Something I say figuratively ... since I don't wear a hat. Unless the temp's somewhere south of zero F. Yours, Chuck

The disintegration of understandable word formation is very apparent. It sounds almost like a person with Sporadic Aphasia - their word retrieval becomes very poor. From a poetic viewpoint, the words you put together, such as tarantula linen is fricken amazing! The title works well with the poem, as it seems the 'words' have been tossed about, and now lay in a sort of disarray. Well done! ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- -"Handle every situation like a dog: if you can't eat it, or screw it, piss on it and walk away!"

if you were hitting the smack in the last few poems, glad you cleared that up with your comment, lol! Everything in this piece is appropriate to the descent the person is feeling here, and you wrapped it up succinctly and perfectly. "I lost my dna, it expired" BRILLIANT! Mark W. Galatians 5:22-23 22 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. Against these, there is no law! My favorite verse(s) in the Bible