Mornings first light

Mornings first light... I love the description for the train... Your poem depicts the way if feels for many each and every day of their lives... I've never ridden a train to work but I can see it very clear with your description... cavern... caverns liked your poem Eddie Richard

It not only describes agonisingly that particular existential dilemma, it is also a valueable lesson to young poets on this site who ask why? why? why? too fucking much. You pose questions neither plaintiff nor rhetorical and let the situation speak. An admirable write. cheers, Jess

Although I never road a train except for one time in Washington DC, I have hopped many a freight in my younger days. I can picture the dead/alive morning travelers desperately wishing they were still home in bed. I absolutely adored this one. Now to business. How did I get here hanging on this strap like some dead flesh traveling through these cavern on this crowded (these is plural so cavern should be caverns) snake, Okay, business over. Great write Eddie. Respectfully, Rett: "When all is said and done, Shut up and relax!" Rett

please allow me to echo the brilliant comments of my fellow poets and say that this is a fantastic piece! you invited my mind to wrap around the words and soak in the metaphor...very engaging! Bravo! <3 Emarie @~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~@ 'My prayer is a rapture in blue' - The Ink Spots 'My Prayer' 1939

*LOL* gotcha! Respectfully, Rett: "It’s impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside." Purplemoondoll

I used to go to the centre of London with my father on his early commuter train sometimes and this poem brings back memories of grey faces, tired eyes, everyone dozing or reading their newspaper, no communication going on, everyone dressed in a boring suit and tie and so on. This is an evocative piece about an experience many readers will have had at some time or may even have every weekday. Best Wishes, Robert. P.S. I didn't like the repetition of 'snake' in two consecutive stanzas.

I am not a morning person either. I have never had to ride a train, but I have been on many buses to school or work. I enjoyed reading. Sincerely, Linda

An enjoyable read, thank you Fleur

Lovely write. My mornings are like this lots of time. Just don't wanna get up yet. I never road a morning train, but did rode a evening train in Atlanta my first time there it was hectic, but a joyful new experience. I wrote a poem about it. I'm gonna kook it up revise it some and post. Respectfully Yours, Barbara

the endless crowded grind you captured so well reminded me how many years it took to jump off into the caverns and get to living again. I got a crawling feeling of desperate claustrophobia firmly stuck in my head as I read your poem. And relief after I finished reading, that I managed to escape the rut! Respectfully, Jim "An armed populace is the last defense against tyrannical government": Race

Ed...first time I was in NYC (1986), I had to get from La Guardia to Midtown bus terminal on 8th Avenue to catch the Dog to Chicago....so I got a taxi...I figured the driver was going to soak me cuz I was a young rube fresh off the proverbial boat, so I flashed him 200 and said "look man, take me where I want go, show me lots of stuff on the way, and whatever's left over is your tip." I got a pretty good tour of Manhattan. I told him to pick up other people if he wanted to, which he did - it was fun asking folks if they wanted to share the cab, most did - so I got to meet NYC folks for the first time too. At the end of the day I gave him an extra hundred and both of us were happy as clams. NYC rocks my friend, I agree. Yah I've lived in Europe too, mainly Britain. Lovely places all, but Midwest USA for me! "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race