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Wafi

Nov 19, 2008 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Dont Ask Me.

When the loneliness creeps
Like a black
Poisonous snake
Over the walls of my heart,
Don't ask me how much it hurts!

When a sad lover reaps
What he never sowed
Walking on solitary road
longing for lost comfort,
Don't ask me how much it hurts!

When the monster of grief peeps
Through the window of my heart,
Wraps me in its black arms
Pricks my body's every part,
Don't ask me how much it hurts!

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17 years 5 months ago

wafi

This is good writing more like what I write. Excruciating painful. Love gone bad or anger makes for good writing I think. I see no errors. I have two such, but different poem and similar in pain delivery. When have time you could read them. Love and Pain, Trenches of Love, She Seeks His Demise. Respectfully Yours, Barbara

17 years 5 months ago

wafi

This is good writing more like what I write. Excruciating painful. Love gone bad or anger makes for good writing I think. I see no errors. I have two such, but different poem and similar in pain delivery. When have time you could read them. Love and Pain, Trenches of Love, She Seeks His Demise. Respectfully Yours, Barbara

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17 years 5 months ago

“Love Gone Bad Or Anger Makes For Good Writing"

Barbara thank you so much for reading and commenting on it.I'm happy you could feel it. "Love gone bad or anger makes for good writing". You are right! our feelings have a great influence on our thoughts and so on our poetry,and i have felt it so many times usually when i feel sad or lonely i write a poem and then my grief or lonliness transforms into a poem in form of words leaving me contented and free of feelings of lonliness or grief... i dont know wether it is same with everyone or not but for me it is so... writting proves to be the best way to get rid of any feeling of dismay or sorrow...lolz changed into feelings of joy and happiness, maybe because of the feelings of creating something like a good poem! Thanks for your kind comment you took it exactly the way i wanted it. I have read some of your work and i enjoyed it, will keep reading them. Wafi

17 years 5 months ago

Yes

when i feel sad or lonely i write a poem and then my grief or lonliness transforms into a poem in form of words leaving me contented and free of feelings of lonliness or grief… This is true of me also is why I wrote the poem *The Bedtime Friend* Respectfully Yours, Barbara

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17 years 5 months ago

Bedtime Friend

yeah i enjoyed it so much. It looks different when reading the first lines untill you read the whole poem. Wafi

17 years 4 months ago

Wafi

I did it that way for a twist to see how it would come off. Glad you liked it. Respectfully Yours, Barbara

17 years 5 months ago

Wow

This is so different to most of your other poems, Wafi, & I love this! You've made me taste the pain what you were experiencing. At first so many emotions came rushing into my mind & I really didn't know what to say & how to say. "When a sad lover reaps, What he never sowed" is very smart. I wish I can come up with lines like that. Only one suggestion, I feel that it's better if you used the word "through" instead of "Into" in this line. Because one would peep through a window instead of peaping into it; "When the monster of grief peeps, Into the window of my heart," Also the comma after "like a black" is really not necessary. Thank you so much for this read which I enjoyed immencely. Nilmini

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17 years 5 months ago

Nilmini

Thank you so much Nilmini for your kind and encouraging appreciation. I am glad you could feel it and liked it. Thanks for the suggestions, I appreciate it. Wafi

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17 years 4 months ago

Thankful To The Moonman.

I am thankful to "The Moonman", who suggested to write "Dont ask me how much it hurts", instead of "Dont ask me how much does it hurt" as I had written before. Wafi

Robert Melliard

Robert Melliard

17 years 4 months ago

Neat poem

This is a neat poem - just about perfect, and that's how poems have to be in order to reach most readers and maybe even survive the passing of time for a while. It's true that in love you reap what you sow (and sometimes not even that) and we often fail to sow enough when we have the opportunity. I like your prose comment in reply to Barbara, too, about the way poetry helps to release/soothe your sadness. Poetry helped me a great deal to get over my brother's death by suicide. I'm afraid most of the poems I wrote on that subject are rather dismal, which is why I haven't posted many of them on this blog, but for me they may even have been a life-saver because I felt so depressed at the time. Best Wishes, Robert.

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17 years 4 months ago

There Is A Joy In Poetic Pain.

Robert Thanks for stopping by, I appreciate your thoughts and feelings and am very sorry for your brother's death. Thanks for reading and commenting. Poetry helps alot to overcome grief and the feelings of dismay. Sometimes you love to be sad and feel the pain. So poetry seems to be the powerful and creative way to fight dismay and grief, and most important to enjoy the pain and sadness sometimes. I dont know wether everyone feels the same or not but sometimes I do want to feel sadness and pain, it is sweet and I love it.. but not always LOL. I remember a quote which I deem important to share here that says; "There is a joy in poetic pain which only poets know" Wafi

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DarkinAZ

17 years 4 months ago

Enjoyed this...

very nice write. Sincerely, Mark

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17 years 4 months ago

Mark

Thanks alot for taking the time to read and comment. Regards, Wafi

M

MysticPoetLady

17 years 4 months ago

Wafi

This is a very well written poem.I really liked the line Walking on solitary road longing for lost comfort.I really liked your styling and usage of words.I think we have all been on that solitary road at one time or another.You captured that very well my friend. Mysticpoetlady

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17 years 4 months ago

Poet Lady

Thanks alot for taking the time to read and comment. Glad you liked it. Welcome to neopoet. Sincerely, Wafi

17 years 4 months ago

Very excellent

I cannot find a single thing you need to change in this! Superior, my friend. Respectfully, Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race

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17 years 4 months ago

Jim

Jim, thank you very much.I appreciate your thoughts. Glad it could grab your attention. Sincerely, Wafi

17 years 4 months ago

Wafi...

Well then.... an excellent read indeed! Richard

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17 years 4 months ago

Richard.

Richard, thank you very much for reading and commenting. Best wishes. Wafi

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easylife_2

17 years 4 months ago

This is good Wafi

Has a sad feel thugh,unlike your other writings,but nonetheless very good,and congratulations on spotlight.

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17 years 4 months ago

Thanks

Thank you very much friend.I appreciate your thoughts. Sincerely yours, Wafi

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17 years 1 month ago

Janice.

Janice, Thank you so much, for reading and commenting. So glad you liked it. I appreciate your loving comments so much. Sincerely, Wafi

17 years 1 month ago

Wafi, lonliness and broken hearts

always makes for a good write. More poems and songs have been written from that perspective than any other. Mankind thrives on adversity. You did a very good job on this. Well done my friend. Well done indeed! Respectfully, Rett: "Next time you think you're perfect, walk on water." "A Democracy can withstand anything but Democrats." Robert A. Heinlein

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17 years 1 month ago

Rett, Thanks

Rett, Thanks a lot, for reading and commenting. Your comments are a source of encouragement and happiness for me. I appreciate your thoughts so much. Sincerely, Wafi

17 years 1 month ago

Wafi, this is the first of

Wafi, this is the first of your poems I have come across in my Neopoet wanderings, and I loved it! Really beautiful and emotive, great job! I also connect with you on your comments about writing, it has always been a cathartic experience for me. Much love b x

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17 years 1 month ago

Thank You So Much

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment on my work. M so glad you liked it and commented on it. I really appreciate your loving words so much. Looking forward to reading your work. Sincerely, Wafi