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The hidden beauty

You are such a rare and alluring
flower standing all alone in
the deepest of forest,

you are rarely gazed upon by
human eyes,

You do not parade or elicit
praise, you hide among the
ferns and green foliage,

to gaze upon your delicate
pedals, one must pull away
at the intertwining vines,

the vines try to choke your beauty
in their venomous crime,

your beauty is beyond reproach,
so why do you hide, there's no
reason or rhythm,

Oh beautiful flower what has
created such beautiful pedals,
was it the rain or the rich fertile
soil,

someone has made you and is
exhausted from toil,

Never have I seen such beauty
that comes naturally, so I ask?

beauty of the most beautiful, come
out of the lush green,

so you can dance in my fondest
of dreams.


— Eduardo Cruz, Oct 24, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New York City, N.Y. Spanish Harlem, USA

Favorite Poets: P. Neruda, Jose de Diego, E. Dickenson, R. Frost, there are many more, but these had the greatest influence...

More from this author

Critiques

themoonman

themoonman

17 years 7 months ago

Hi Eddie...

nice thoughts conveyed with this one, I just think some of the wording could be changed a bit to make it read a little smoother... You are a rare and alluring flower sitting all alone in the deepest of forest You are the rare and alluring flower sitting alone in the deepest forest.. sitting.. or standing? pedals... petals I think would be the correct word here. love the ending... Richard
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Hey Richard,

thank you so much, I made some of the changes you suggested, and it does sound better. It's always a pleasure to hear from you!! I'm happy you liked it thanks again, Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Hey Barbara,

thank you so much for your comments, nice to hear from you!! I hope your feeling better!! Love, Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
Z

zarul

17 years 7 months ago

hye

i can sense how beautiful and rare the flower is. mayb it is like an orchid that are too rare that it is not found for 1000's of years. it is the orchid that is belieed to be the key ingredient for making an elixir that promises immortality. this is a ery lovely poem. i hope i can create a poem this beautiful when loe come to me. this poem truly desres compliment. but, i has a suggestion. why dont u add such in the first line 'You are SUCH a rare and alluring' i think this one will make the poem more conincing and more beautiful. this is just an idea of mine. u hae eery right to discard it ZARUL
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

zarul,

I took your suggestion, thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
P

prayersbyPatty

17 years 7 months ago

Eddie, this is cool

A flower in the forest, like a poem, in the middle of a song. Patty
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Patty,

it's the sunshine from your Avatar that has nourished my flower. It's great to here from you! Thank you so much! Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Janice H.

I think that Eduardo is to formal I believe that by now you could call me Eddie I am so happy you like it. It's always nice to hear from you! Thanks, Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 7 months ago

Eddie

Hmm... The reason why there's hidden beauties in my garden is because I don't have time to weed it! Just a friendly poke. In all seriousness, I really enjoyed this poem. Sometimes the most lovely things are hidden where you really need to dig for them - and in very unsuspecting places. ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- -"So you stand on the corner in your new English clothes, and you look so polished from your hair down to your toes. Ah, but still your finger's gonna pick your nose after all." - Billy Joel
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Jess,

you hit the nail right on the head, your uncanny ability to get in my head is scary. That's the whole point that beauty is not always what we see or think to be beautiful in our eyes, but the inner beauty we see with our minds and hidden behind what the world calls ugly. thanks Jess I love that mind of yours. I'd like to buy it, NO. LOL Eddie PS. I guess you made to PA. with no problem. that's great! "hey, you want to put your pants back on your distracting me" LOL
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 7 months ago

Eddie

Sorry for the distraction, it's your fault for asking for proof! LOL! My warped little mind does falter occasionally, though, as I sometimes can't immediately grasp the greater meaning to a simply laid out poem. Your comments have me a-blushin' my friend. You're too much. :~) ~"veggie" ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- -"So you stand on the corner in your new English clothes, and you look so polished from your hair down to your toes. Ah, but still your finger's gonna pick your nose after all." - Billy Joel
Janice Pearce

Janice Pearce

17 years 7 months ago

Eddie

Just like the beauty found in the forest, there is beauty in your poem!! Line 9 "to gaze" picky me~ ~~~~~~~~~~~Wanda Sykes For President~~~~~~~~
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Janice,

thanks took care of it. thanks for the generous comment. Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
Rett

Rett

17 years 7 months ago

Ah Eddie, such beauty

Excellent job my friend. You have crafted another fine one. I really liked reading this one. It had such meaning within the words you have written. A couple of suggestions if I may. You do not parade or illicit (elicit) Illicit=unlawful, elicit=asking or wanting pedals, one must pull away(petals) was the it rain or the rich fertile (was it the rail or the rich fertile) Well done sir. Respectfully, Rett: "You want change? Let's elect a president and give him total power for a year. At the end of one year he is marched out into the middle of Reliant Stadium in Houston and locked in with 50,000 of the American people. Let them decide
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Rett

changes have been made thank you, I appreciate your comments. thanks Judge Tex. Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
P

prayersbyPatty

17 years 7 months ago

Wow did you do a

re-write or is it better the second time around. Love it, Patty throws rainbows
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Patty

thamks for the rainbow, and your second visit. Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
yenti

yenti

17 years 7 months ago

Hidden Beauty

A beautiful portrayal of hidden beauty, Also to look at a flower from the inside as looking at people, and then putting them together as one entity, form, person what ever, is an art that most of us have sadly lost Your writing touched the flower, Yours Ian.T
Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

17 years 7 months ago

Ian,

thanks for the comment and your ability to see the hidden meaning. Eddie "do like the once barren tree: flourish and like the planted seed: rise" Jose de Deigo
weirdelf

weirdelf

17 years 7 months ago

Honestly man

this gives little to poetry. That is not a pure put down, it's just that so much has been so much better. As much as I give you shit I think you have great potential. My only suggestion is to read the truly great poets. cheers, Jess