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C
Calliope
Sep 20, 2008 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

The Piper

To the piper's gate
I rush headlong
with thoughts of fate
I sing along

There is beauty in his lilting
There's longing in his tune
So far over my heart is tilting
His voice my only boon

Such wonder in his words
A heady mix of passions fire
He can even charm the birds
The piper of my heart's desire
— Calliope, Sep 20, 2008

About the Author

Region, Country: New York, USA

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Critiques

D

DarkinAZ

17 years 10 months ago

Very Nice write!

Wow, I am the first to comment on one of yours? That's rare. Nice poem, friend. Sincerely, Mark
J

jona

17 years 10 months ago

GREAT POEM

Go on yourself big yin!as a scotsman i just love this you wrote!can hear the words being sung with a pipe band!yahooo!cheers!keep up the good writes
W

W.C.Wampler

17 years 10 months ago

The Piper

C, The Piper can be taken many ways. I think you did that on pupose. What I think of is, the piper calling. The magic lure. My parents made sure to read me , The Pied Piper of Hamlin. Since then, I've heard, and followed, many a'magic tune. wcw
weirdelf

weirdelf

17 years 10 months ago

Good to see you again

Enjoyed this, as WC said it does have some intriguing ambiguities Just one tiny thing bothered me a bit. The line- So far over my heart is tilting breaks the scansion. Not sure how to fix it. One less syllable? Crisper metre? See what you think. cheers, Jess
C

Calliope

17 years 10 months ago

Thanks guys for reading

I'll toss your suggestion around and see what happens,Jess Lacy Where power corrupts,poetry cleanses.
professor

professor

17 years 9 months ago

The Piper of your hearts desire

Long may he play your most intimate tune Lacy. The guys are right about the line "So far over my heart is tilting" it is 9 syllables instead of the 8 you need for this kind of strong rhythm, poetic ballad. It is easily remedied though by just saying "So far over my heart's tilting". Would make a good song i think...or may be you sing it already lol. Keith
L

lyz

16 years 10 months ago

Dear Calliope

A loving write, especially if it is where you want to be. Enjoyed your use of words and to the pipers tune, I hope your hearts desires are fulfilled. Lol. Lyz.XX

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