Fossil

What I mean is this: You've chosen freeform and then adhered to an almost classical structure that, in my less than humble opinion, detracts from the flow and pacing of this excellently worded poem. Additionally, the structure you've chosen forced you to use some odd punctuation conventions in order to attempt to get the pacing you appear to want. Since I have no shame, I will restructure your poem how I heard it in my head to show you what I mean: --------------------------- Fossil The relic that digs deep into my every waking thought, laying down it’s ghostly form in the files of my memory. The pressure of those layers excluding the outdated ideas, of you and I, a new period, a new geology is required. Incapable of change to our new scenario, too wary of Metamorphic forces; Are we really that timid to break the outer shell, to reveal our organic prize? The fossil remains in stasis, incapable of living with or without. --------------------------- Now, of course, this is just how I read it. You have a pacing and flow in your mind. I would encourage you to review and restructure, embracing the freeform flow and building your poem, stone by stone, until you have the dwelling you desire to house your idea. Hey, I may have to use that line, I rather like it. --Jonathan Annoying the world, one person at a time (Group discounts available)

I like the way you merged your idea with geology and fossils without in any way detracting from your message.I consider this a very good write.Thank you.

Well done. The metaphors are excellent in this work Chrys

shroedingers cat (mind the spellink) is there somewhere neither here a treasure immersed in profile

you got a strong theme going here. i love the word fossil. i feel that even the small words we use have a lot of energy and you've woven them together well. wow.