Confessions to Myself

Never did I say things would be this way
I never told myself things would be alright
Life is now just this, a vibrant shade of gray
And I confess to you today
I have finally lost this fight

I know I said I was sure that I was right
Truth is, I did, and I tried with all my might
To succeed, and do what I told you to do
To proceed and mend the wrongs I ever did to you
I am sorry, I have ruined you

I’m tired of pretending I am not afraid,
Tired of suppressing my fears and in the trade
I have lost sight of what I set for you
I have lost control in everything I do.
I am sorry; I never meant to ruin you

I confess, I am helpless
Falling down the very path I wanted to journey
I am tired, and am getting breathless
I have no more a fight left in me... 

Today, I confess, and admit that I was wrong
This day, I realize, this isn’t where I belong
Every day, I tried hard, I tried to be strong
But I was wrong, I WAS WRONG...
I give up on my will; I give in to you, fate
I merge the very paths I tried to separate
I have lost not just what I loved, but everything I did ever hate
I should try to help you, but it is now too late

I confess, I can no longer pretend
I confess, I have reached the end...