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High On A Wild Hill A Wild Child Grows

1.

High
on a wild hill,
there grows
a wildflower,

an Ode To Joy
bursting through
all
that is
silently green,

"Who are you to possess me so thoroughly?"

I ask the wild wind
that annoints me
with
this sudden ecstasy.

2.

I was a wild child once,
born into a wild universe
by a wild man and a wild woman
who showed me how they
lost their wildness.

Everywhere I went I saw things
wild...

willow trees, cyan skies and
the night moon spoke
to me of their wildness,

and in my tamed wildness, I nearly
died...

I am silent now,

a river runs through me.




— Kailashana, Jun 04, 2008

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RSScheerer

RSScheerer

18 years ago

A lot of wildness

Part 1 - enthralling, moving the mind towards green hills and one small wildflower in the midst of silence and peace. Part 2 - in attempting to emphasize your wildness, the word loses its importance in this poem. Perhaps showing a contrast with a new word, e.g. "they showed me the path to their complaisance" "spoke to me of their unbridled nature" "in my tamed condition" As always, suggestions to be taken or thrown aside - you know this by now! Best, Ronda
Kailashana

Kailashana

18 years ago

That’s *It* Rhonda, the

That's *It* Rhonda, the wildness loses its importance... silence... is not *wild* but contains *wildness*. Was debating about putting #2 to #1. Perhaps it might work better? Whatya think? Bestest, Anna
RSScheerer

RSScheerer

18 years ago

Anna

I'd leave them in the order you have them, unless you have a specific reason for thinking they'd work better reversed. Are you thinking that it's better to begin with the emphasis on the wildness and close with the wild wind annointing the "child" once again? (just noticed you're missing an 'n' in annointing - see I miss stuff, too!) Now, what do you think? :) ~ Ronda
Kailashana

Kailashana

18 years ago

what do I think? haven’t

what do I think? haven't the foggiest ;-) regardless, I love your *interpretation* Ronda... ~ Anna p.s. i knew it was missing when I selected the poem from my word files... and still i forgot to change it. lol.
RSScheerer

RSScheerer

18 years ago

Leave it be, then. Love it

Leave it be, then. Love it the way it is. My *interpretation* .... hopefully it's not so far off the map that I'm lost in the ocean! ~ Ronda
Seren

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Mum

I can see a river pf flowing poetry in this one ... bravo is all I can say love and hugs Jayne x x x