Time Capsule

As I dwell in an otherwordly realm
An air of mysterious intensity fellowships with me tonight
Where anything is possible

Faint shadows of the past flit and flutter in areas of my mind
That I supposed were long dormant as I experience
A long forgotten feeling, a fleeting moment,
And as the feeling wells up inside my heart...
I pray to keep the recovered moment alive forever,
As I would pray to hold close a valued friend

Oh! These memories are like thousands of tiny footprints
That the years shall never erase

How amazing, the strange wistful fondness that I feel
For that which I cannot touch,
For that which I cannot relive...

But the impressions they have left in my heart,
Like thousands of tiny footprints...
Shall dwell with me forever

Wolfycat

— wolfycat, May 23, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

Jonathan Moore

18 years ago

I like it

But I would drop the use of the ellipses as they appear as more of a distraction than anything else. Also, i would revisit the punctuation. currently it is a bit disjointed and creates a jarring feeling as I make my way through the poem. Punctuation is one of those things that I have the most difficulty getting right in my work so I scrutinize it more than may be normal. Very nice imagery though, a great capture of the sudden memory the floods back into our soul unexpectedly bringing nearly all of the original sensations. --Jonathan Annoying the world, one person at a time (Group discounts available)

wolfycat

18 years ago

Thanks very much, Jonathan,

I do appreciate the help on this poem and when I can sit down and go through it, I'll change some things and see if it flows better. It was kind of you to take the time to critique this for me. Cathy