By The Way, Were You A Fan of Ally McBeal?

Following is an important recorded message

left on your voice mail:

“Mr. Jack Jones?  Is anyone home?

“This is Miss Amnesia calling in

to say everything is Ok.

(And I’m wearing my slinkiest

shortest black silk dress

with nothing underneath but some

curves and bones for cling-to appearances,

black T-Strap 6-inch stiletto heels

and a string of Majorica pearls.)"

“Yes, everything is ok,

you’ve only got The-Newly-Divorced-Syndrome

and it’s written all over you,

(Don’t worry, no one else can read

the truth of your affliction.)

You think you’re Jesus

and you’re saving all the

Whores of Babylon

with your Kama Sutra

er.. positioning.

But, just in case, you

didn’t know

the price you’re paying

is no laughing matter, even

if it comes at the cost

of your blissfully ignorant… dumbstick.

(I do hope you don’t take yourself

wayyyyyyyyyy too seriously.)

Have a nice day Mr. Jones.”