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The Sweetest War

 

and with a single, misfired,

Unthinking word,

The pyres are lit,

The troops are roused

And the horns are blown.

 

Then onto the plains, 

with standards high,

Our armies march.

The beat of our war drums

Ring out across the hills,

Vibrations tearing

Destroying the landscape.

 

Across those shattered fields

Our Warriors drop, 

Into the deepest,

Darkest valley,

Where the battle truly begins.

 

They grapple and flail,

Back and forth,

Wrestling for position;

The “one up”, the “coup de grace”!

 

Fiercer now 

and with unrelenting malice we continue, 

The blood of our hearts spilling,

Drenching,

Blinding our sight.

 

As we reach our peak,

The sky gives way, 

Crumbling apart.

 

Then the salt rain flows,

Our armies retreat,

Washing the blood,
Redeeming our hearts,
 

 

and with an embrace we fall back.


— Kieran Nelson, May 12, 2008

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Critiques

weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years ago

This is weird shit, man

I didn't feel like I was reading a poem. I felt like I was experiencing a poetic graphic novel. Bloody brilliant. cheers, Jess
KN

Kieran Nelson

18 years ago

It was inspired a bit by

It was inspired a bit by 300, I'll give you that! Thanks for the comment Kieran "Mind, how you go!" - Roger McGough's poem for LSD Awareness Week
R

rider68

18 years ago

Very Creative

Brilliant Account, Flowed really well, very clever and great read, Best Regards Peter ~~~~~~~~~Creativity Is to think more efficiently~~~~~~~~~~
D

DarkinAZ

17 years 11 months ago

Long time no see,

I really enjoyed this tale of war, and the embracing at the end, shows that when all is said and done, we are still human. Sincerely, Mark
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 11 months ago

Kieran

Good to see you posting again. Inspired by 300, eh? What a disturbing movie to use as an inspiration! The flow was very nice, and it was almost like the reader was standing on the battlefield themselves! ~Jess K. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ~ "Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer!" ~ "Your inferiority complex is better than mine!"
O

orgami

17 years 11 months ago

battle poem epic

I loved 300 love story buddy story betrayal loyalty ideals principles avenge an epic as is your poem!!