One Chance

                                 While we are here,it is proven
                                  for each breath that we give
                                   in all chances to flourish
                                   lies just one chance to live.

                                 We may use one for comfort,
                                    spend another for peace.
                                      In our humanly journey,
                                     let our efforts not cease.

                                     Our time is fast passing...
                                       clocks have no delay
                                we must heed a great caution
                                    things we feel,do,and say.

Place no greed in findings
                                         for fleeting reward....
                                     Give kindness to others.
                                      all the heart can afford.

                                     Because also is proven
                                  while each journey is tough
                                      all the chances to love
                                   make man worthy enough.

— JWwildcat2012, May 10, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Brownsville,KY USA

Favorite Poets: D. H Lawrence and Robert Frost

Critiques

infinite_dwarf

18 years 1 month ago

good message

We've all been given a chance - let's use it correctly. ~Lynn (Jess K.) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ~ "If guns kill people, then I can blame mis-spelled words on my pencil.." - Larry the Cable Guy ~ "Driver carries less than $20 in remorse..."

JWwildcat2012

18 years 1 month ago

response to One chance

Lynn,I am glad you liked my poem "One Chance".And you show a good sense of humor,which I believe is where people use their chances to live the wisest,because when we show the ability to laugh and smile at ourselves and with one another,we only add to our longevity while doing it.Thanks again,and try to read some of my other work.I welcome your opinion.

Arrow

17 years 3 months ago

I like the rhyme scheme here

but it reads a little awkwardly in places. Clearer punctuation might help. For example, We may use one for comfort(,) spend another for peace(.) (I)n our human journey(,) let our efforts not cease. The following stanza has a strong message so you might consider starting it with stronger words (verbs) rather than weaker words (conjunctions). For example: Place no greed in findings for fleeting reward(.) Gift kindness to others(,) all the heart can afford. This reminds me of a poem by Foss called The House by the Side of the Road. You might enjoy it. I'd copy it here but it's rather long. Nice to meet you.

JWwildcat2012

17 years 3 months ago

Thank you for reading

I appreciate your viewpoints on my poem.In fact,i agree with them.A lot of poems can have a sharper affect when verbs are used properly.I will make the necessary revisions to them soon.Thank you so much for seeing the differences,and i hope you continue to read my work.