Putting down the bat

some days are like that..enjoyed reading but I don't want to hold the bat of perfection..it'd burn my hands...lol Richard

Great lines: I swing the bat of perfection Hoping that it will guide me in the right direction Blunt force trauma just beating me down Fetal-ing up like a virgin in a wedding gown Always, Cat

If someone else treated me like this They’d surely meet my raging fist So take this bat and do what you will Just for today I’ve had my fill I can so relate - this describes my week. Tonight I finally calmed down and found a little peace and balance. Thanks frost - reading this got it all out of my system! Kaz It's impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.

Smiles:) Barbara I'm way to imperfect to hold that bat. Too mean. Enjoyed reading, well written, flowed well. Great writing. Congratulation in the spotlight.

without grit things that seem rightous hinder our advancement what is to become of those we once hit? In ink, Dabbler

This was a well written poem - I liked the rhythmical flow. It was enhanced by your rhyme scheme rather than weakened by it - which is not always easy to do. You had some incredible and unexpected phrases - such as the wedding gown. To nit-pick a little- I'd say -lose the "am" in I am so sick and just go with "I'm" - this is less formal and rhythmically I think it will improve that line. Also, I'd say "Calloused" - because you are using past tense: grown. I think if you come back to this at a later date, you could probably pull a few small words such as "of, and, the" here and there and not worry that the poem is speaking in full sentences, but let it be more like punches. For Example: I'm sick of self loathing Hope it's in the right direction High self esteem unreachable Anyway, I think you get the gist. It is a very emotive write and one many can relate to easily. I can certainly see why it received such praise and high marks. I think with a tad tightening - you can knock this one out of the park!

If someone told me that rhyme would work in a piece like this, I'd be extremely doubtful ... and then there you are. Great word use to emote bitterness and the rhyme actually lends to what I sense as sarcasm. "Pain that makes me teachable" That one line says so much. So many give in to pain without learning from it. There are too many easy ways out. This poem fights back, as do you. Ronda

I would think of a bat normally as a swing and hit. I think only the poet would find the depth you have in associating those three complicated ideas with the bat. mark

A good friend once said to me "If you referred to me the way you refer to yourself I would punch your fucking face in and if you wanted to make me as good as you seem to need yourself to be I would say fuck of and get a guru or god". Despite the expletives he was a wise perceptive friend. cheers, Jess

One of my favourite word-smiths in rock'n'roll is the sadly departed Warren Zevon. This reminded me slightly of his ironic "Ain't That Pretty At All." The lines "I'm going to hurl myself at the wall/'cause I'd rather feel bad then not feel anything at all..." The humour in this piece was not over-whelming, just a fine accent to the work and its under-pinning of anger. I've read several of yours now, and they please me to the point of "oh good, another one by Frost...." Alobar (Just my two cents, spend them on gum if you wish.)

this has... fire! alot of energy!