Achilles Heel

I see secrets in your eyes
their pain intense,hidden behind lies
in my mind i hear your cries
as your soul slowly dies

You smile but its not real
you don't let anyone know how you feel
you guard your heart so they don't steal
what's left of your Achilles heel

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New York, USA

Comments

professor

18 years 1 month ago

Achilles

If only his Mum had just dropped him in the Styx and given him his first swimming lesson he would have been invincible and we would have been scratching around for another symbol of a fatal vulnerability...another one of those "what ifs". This is an interesting little cameo from you Lacy that undoubtedly has more at its root than you are letting on. There is just one line that does not flow quite as well as the others in the first verse. The original is nine syllables whereas ten usually feels more comfortable. However it is beginning the line with "intense" that halts the flow in its tracks a little. So how about: "their pain intense and hidden behind lies" as ever, Proff

Frost Smith

18 years ago

calliope...

the interesting thing is that like skin that can develop a callous by doing the same thing over and over again; so can your insides, they toughen up over time if you expose them. However the complete opposite is most common; for me at least, never let anyone in; and when you do its frightingly raw. Good topic Frost

purplemoondoll

18 years ago

I can so relate to this

I can so relate to this poem. Great expression of emotion in so few lines. I like you more recent work! Kaz It's impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.

Calliope

18 years ago

Kaz

When yoiu said you liked my more recent work is because a lot of the first tjhat i posted were written over a period of years before I stopped writing altogether for a long time and this site has given me a lot.Thank you for your praise ,always an honor. Lacy, Where power corrupts,poetry cleanses.