Passion's Ash, Passion's Sin

Challenge accepted, but no guarantees--if I'm not happy with what comes... well you know: the trash can is usually full next to my desk. I think I'll wait and see were the next verses take me before I work on the title. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, I write the title last. When composing a poem (or story, or novel) I usually don't know where I'm going to end up--poems take on a life of their own as I write, and can grow (or wither) in surprising ways sometimes. "You said resolves or exaggerates the conflict," which I thought interesting. I don't necessarily think there is any conflict in the poem, just in the individual narrating the poem--conflicted feelings within him(her)self: they still love but there is no passion; is it love of the person or love of the memory of what they had, or is it love of that intense sexual heat of the beginning of the relationship that fades as relationship's evolve and mature? (see, grows in all kinds of ways.) Hmm... I've definitely got some thinking to do.

Pointy hat always welcome at the party. I definitely prefer naked to nude, rhymes with rude--will not do. I am considering the rhythm of the first two lines but we shall see as new verses develop(?) Thanks as always.

"certainly you could elaborate..and do it well." I don't know, what do you think, how'd I do (not done yet, if I decide to keep the second verse)?

Thanks for reading and commenting. As I mentioned above I am considering expanding, but we shall see. As far at the rating, it works like so: Average is calculated by the machine, to votes hover over "Your rating:" to apply a vote/rating, but only if you want to vote. Your rating will go into the Average calculation. Personally, I try to vote on every poem I read, but I know others only vote on poems that strike them strongly (negatively or positively) and in the end, it is up to the member to decide their own reasoning/methodology for when to vote or not. I don't write in rhyme very often, so this is a bit of an experiment for me. But that what this is all about: stretching the limits, growing as a poet. Thanks for chiming in.

You are right, the parenthetical line is not needed. Gone. Considered your other line suggestion but I think changes the meaning--the narrator's view is that he/she is hiding the desire not just from the narrator but from themselves as well. Thanks for your comments, curious of your opinions of my addition.

Very much a work-in-progress, and I'm not sure where I'm going with it, I may re-write entire verses. Originally I only had the first verse, and considered ending right there. Now there are three. I think there is some explanation of the preceding verses in the succeeding ones, or at least I'm trying for that. These comments have been invaluable, inspirational, and motivating. Thanks to all. (and keep 'em coming, this poem ain't goin' to write itself! ha ha)

Typo on the quote, it goes to the end of the stanza. Corrected. I read it out loud several times, as is and with your suggestion. I think it flows better with the added beat. There's no precise formula--I don't know that I could ever be that structured--but I tried to make the lines longer in the first stanza, and shorten in subsequent stanzas, give a sense of sinking to the poem, and of unthinkingness (look at that, I invented another word). As always, thank you for your comments, suggestions and compliments--your keen eye is a valuable resource on this site.