Red Hair

Where did you go?
 
I lost touch with you and when I did
you
     slipped
               beneath  
                           the 
                                 waves.
 
After a husband's suicide...
 
Of those hard men who love to break
not hold
 
In those moments of
desperation
between  
flight
or
fight
 
What happened to you?
 
You were the sister I always wanted
good enough for cousins but still...
  You thought your life was in Spain
and                we                parted
 
His  
death
came at the price
of  
your  
spirit
 
Was it enough?
 
Can you  
place a measure
on that     little
girl   with   red     hair
sitting
on her
grandfather's  
tractor?
 
What did you do?
 
His choking
on dancing vapors
from his exhaust pipe
must  
have
come  
as a
surprise.
 
How did you explain?
 
The shrine made on the dashboard to his daughters?
Will they always see a golden ring
surrounded by blue fumes
as a  
sign  
of  
death?
 
His instability
His inability
were his  
downfall
 
Clipping your wings to stay earthbound with a dead husband has been a solution?
 
What does the sun tell you?
           
                                      Rise
 
Does the sea still  
         
                                     and fall on
 
The other side of history?
 
Do voices of antiquity
in steamy town squares
whisper their stories?
 
Or has their chatter
                            fallen
                                 silent
                                       when 
                                             you  
                                                 begin
                                                       screaming
                                                                    in your head?
 
Will you come back?
 
The pinyons miss your inner
radiance
As much as the sun misses your
face.
 
Walk once more
                       with the grace 
                                           that God gave
                                                              all women.
 
Find again home
those places
that filled
you  
with
light.
 
Come find the little girl
on the tractor
who was once
all smiles
and
red hair.
 
-DS Baker